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coworker majorly disrespects me & i do nothing(physical)

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  • #16
    He didn't explain in more detail how did the girl hit him. I got the impression that she hit him in the face with her fist. In that case,I would certanly atleast slap her back,it's self defense.
    Now if she hit him more jokingly without any force in the hit,thats different thing.
    Like I said,he didnt explain it properly

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    • #17
      my bad i read both Daigoro and throughfare's comments yesterday morning and when i got home after work i had intended on posting more but was in abit of a rush and just quickly thanked them.


      He didn't explain in more detail how did the girl hit him. I got the impression that she hit him in the face with her fist. In that case,I would certanly atleast slap her back,it's self defense.
      Now if she hit him more jokingly without any force in the hit,thats different thing.
      Like I said,he didnt explain it properly
      yeah my bad again.
      your impression was right but it was with no force.

      she moved her fist in slowly (but somehow fast) and hit me on the side on the cheek.
      it wasnt so slow that i didnt see it. but fast enough for me to be shocked.


      now on to Daigoro:

      Learn to depend on no one but yourself. This is the true wisdom of this community.
      i like this quote but im still asking people for questions. (pretty much depending on those answers)
      but do you mean that the more clarity i get the less questions ill ask and in turn the less i depend on the answers? or anything for that matter.

      Now here's the rub: every problem that you will ever encounter with women and with your self-esteem for the rest of your life will hinge upon how you choose to deal with the mess you just explained. Did you notice how guys like insurgent, dpancake and SexualHero just zeroed right in on your shit? People pick up on your "presence," as JetSetJim was saying, even over the fucking internet. You think girls with their funky emotional antennae can't spot a fun target in person?
      i dont understand what you mean by zeroed right in on my shit? i cant see it, could you help me out and show me?
      the last sentence got me thinking, again in person as im talking to people etc this line popped into my head.

      But you came to the right place--the best place I can think of on the net for young men with issues.
      im glad i found this place. it has changed me ALOT!

      Cuz it's all on you, son. There's no Magic Bullets for finding peace with your past; no system for how to live your life. The best I can offer is for you to keep firing away with your thoughts or questions on the forum, while struggling to work things out for real. That's how we'll know you're getting it. Guys will be here to answer, explain or share. But you need to get urgent, excited and unshakable about cultivating real inner change.
      im speechless.

      If you're interested, I'll be happy to forward you some cool links, ebooks and meditation mp3s that helped me. Check out the thread right below about "Too nervous while talking to women." There's some good advice there and some awesome Youtube links by Solus. If that's not your kind of thing, no problem.
      yes i would like that.
      i looked at that thread and that very audio is what i've been listening to for nearly a year.
      Paul McKenna is a legend in my books.

      But seducing girls should be a distant last on your schedule of priorities (although an occasional BJ never killed anyone).
      i was actually staring at a hot chick the other day thinking of this exact line you wrote.
      ill take your advice on this.


      And the next time anyone disrespects you, remember you've got 5000 years of experience behind you.
      sometimes i forget who im actually asking these questions to. (guys that get laid)
      well a good percentage of them.

      i'd like to thank you for the time you took to write that reply, from what you said you've read every word i wrote and i appreciate that.

      last note: i dont know what it is but you have some kind of a skill that gets me thinking about a couple sentences you wrote, and they happened in person just randomly.
      i wasnt talking about anything related to this and BANG its on my mind.


      Thanks alot
      - Jayson

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      • #18
        Originally posted by Silenced View Post
        idk who said it but bumping into people is a good thing or something. so thats why i didnt (i ended up apologising after)
        I disagree. Bumping into people isn't a good thing. In that sort of environment you're probably brushing into each other a lot, so I can understand that you maybe don't say sorry every time... but if the contact is more significant there's no harm in manners. A sorry or "You alright?" does the trick. A good rule of thumb - if the contact is significant enough that you'll remember it later you should acknowledge it in the moment.

        Originally posted by Silenced View Post
        back in the days i thought saying no was the worst thing you could ever posibly say to a chick.
        I don't think it really matters that she's a chick. It's good that you can say no, but you can do it politely as well.

        Originally posted by Silenced View Post
        no i dont hit on chicks at work after reading you shouldnt and some semi situations at work.
        i can say 100% ive never hit on either of these chicks or even chick #3
        OK. But I think the way you are relating to these girls is as targets even if you're not actively hitting on them. There's a few levels of confusion in your interactions.

        A lot of what we do in seduction works specifically because we're hitting on the chick. It's the sexual tension and framing that makes the interaction work. If you take the sexy out of cocky funny you're just an arrogant asshole. If you take the flirty out of negs all you have is an insult. If you take the seduction out of kino all you're left with is creepy and inappropriate touching.

        Game without getting sexual is like a tent that's missing the upright strut. The whole thing just collapses on itself.

        What you need to work on is INNER GAME - your confidence. At work you simply need to be professional. Work on your game elsewhere and your confidence will rise. End result? People will see your confidence and congruence and stop fucking with you.

        I think a good start for you would be to construct a much more positive narrative about yourself. For example...

        As I was growing up I moved schools a lot so I became really good at making friends with new people. This has made me a very adaptable and resilient person. As a kid I came through a lot of difficult situations but I became even stronger because of it. It wasn't easy for a long time but eventually my grandparents took us in. Yeah, I did some stupid things, but all kids do. And guess what? I can drive too, just don't ask me how I learned... Did I mention that I cook? I learned so I could look after and feed my little brother. Family is so important to me. That's why I used to give my mom money to help her out, I thought I was being kind, but I eventually realised the best way to help her and myself was to say no. Now I am on a real journey of self-improvement and discovery. I have already accomplished a great deal in overcoming the challenges of my past, so I know that with the same level of application and dedication I can succeed in reaching all of my goals. It won't be easy because nothing worthwhile ever is, but what's difficult for some other people is nothing to me.

        I am fucking awesome.

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        • #19
          Solus your a fucken genius!

          i really do have some negative thought patterns and i reckon this will fix them!


          I am fucking awesome.


          I disagree. Bumping into people isn't a good thing. In that sort of environment you're probably brushing into each other a lot, so I can understand that you maybe don't say sorry every time... but if the contact is more significant there's no harm in manners. A sorry or "You alright?" does the trick. A good rule of thumb - if the contact is significant enough that you'll remember it later you should acknowledge it in the moment.
          yes this was the first time i have done that at work, and not asked if there alright.


          OK. But I think the way you are relating to these girls is as targets even if you're not actively hitting on them. There's a few levels of confusion in your interactions.
          your actually right.
          im refering my coworkers as targets like you said. so just refer to them as coworkers who are working just like me?(im a bit confused lol)

          thanks again solus

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