How To Deal With Self/Looks Depreciating Comments By Girl without Being All "Oh, no, you're cute, it's ok, blah blah"

[SargeMaximus]

Hey guys. Getting this a LOT lately. Girls talking about their looks

"I hope I look good enough for you"

"Don't expect anything crazy"

"I'm not sexy, sorry"

"My ass isn't a model type"

How the FUCK do you deal with that? So far I just been ignoring and changing subjects but I feel like there's an alpha way to respond I'm not aware of.

Anyone?

[DNYC]

"I'll be the judge of that." Deliver with a smirk, then move past it.

[SargeMaximus]

Awesome line. Thanks.
What if they bring another one up? Like say they’re like “oh my ass is too big” and I’m like “I’ll be the judge of that” and later she’s like “I’m not sexy” then what? Just keep using a variation of that line?

[Delenclos]

her: “oh my ass is too big”
you: “yes and I like it.”

Like with shit-tests, it’s not about memorising lines. It’s about your attitude.

[SargeMaximus]

Ok, thanks

[Grodmeister General]

these are IODs ...you need to IOD back then DHV then throw out a compliance test (something not similiar) then reward and intermitted IOD!

[Skills360]

Hey guys. Getting this a LOT lately. Girls talking about their looks

"I hope I look good enough for you"

"Don't expect anything crazy"

"I'm not sexy, sorry"

"My ass isn't a model type"

How the FUCK do you deal with that? So far I just been ignoring and changing subjects but I feel like there's an alpha way to respond I'm not aware of.

Anyone?

As always looking for magic lines is not the answer but understanding the why?

the fist one is good: "I hope I look good enough for you" that means she likes you but she feels you can do better so you can address that issue, "oh i really like the way you look and more than that i really like your vibe and personality" So you are sub communicating that is not only physical and then you do a fake cold read " we are going to like each other, get along great and have an awesome time, you will love me, trust me"

All the other ones is you doing or writing or saying something uncalibrated or off to trigger such responses... like if i tell a girl with a cups, "omg i love your tits" when is obvious she has a cup will trigger such type response... "my tits are not all that" ...


Something off you are saying about them that is not congruent with them:



"Don't expect anything crazy"

"I'm not sexy, sorry"

"My ass isn't a model type"

[SargeMaximus]

Lol, I am looking to understand but lines help.

What did you mean by “something off you are saying about them that is not congruent with them”?

[Guest]

Had a somewhat similar conversation with a woman yesterday (she's actually still sleeping in my bed upstairs). She's kind of an unconventional beauty. You know, like, she doesn't fit the description of "sexy" for most body parts seperately. But taken all together, she's quite stunning, especially when she cracks a smile.

So when she was telling me she sometimes feels jealous of others who "score" better on this body part or that according to some scoreboard thought up by some random magazine or whatever, I asked her a few questions:
- Why do you think it's mostly women who question their beauty? Why would it be connected to their self-worth as much? And who might profit from that?
- Do you truly believe there's only one standard of beauty, and the world would be better off if everyone would fit that?

Conversation on that topic was over in less than a minute. She's clever enough to see through the power struggles at the core of this.

And perhaps more importantly: she now knows I do as well. So she won't have to follow double standards based on my own preferences AND those of society to impress me. Makes things so much easier for both of us.

It sure helps to sprinkle out time together with compliments every now and then when it's authentic to do so. I think it's kind of weird to tell someone she's beautiful (or whatever) after she asks me to tell her so. But for example yesterday evening when she was lying in my bed, already half-undressed, grinning almost from ear to ear, that was fucking cute. So I did tell her so. Which was highly appreciated.. she then told me she sometimes still has troubles accepting compliments like that. So I told her to better get used to it, because sometimes those might just slip through. Didn't think it was possible, but that grin got even wider then :P

I guess the main point is that there are two types of compliments. The ones you share simply because it's an authentic thing to do, and you don't care much whether those words will have any effect. You're just stating a subjective truth you see (like in the above example). And then there are the ones you "use" in order to get a certain reaction from somebody.

You can't really go wrong with the first type, but very wrong with the second. Which is why I refrain from doing the latter at all. If you're authentically attracted to someone, this should be very easy to follow through with. And if you're not: Why the fuck are you with this someone anyway

Jester

[Guest]

A lot of the things girls say can be plowed through with solid game. No need to respond to her statements. Stick to your game. Let her say whatever to fill in the gaps and keep the conversation flowing. Its all good, basically!

[SargeMaximus]

I dig this ijjjji. Thanks!