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notes from a couple of days with cosy

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  • notes from a couple of days with cosy

    I spent some days at cosy's place and from very few interactions I actually learned some important basic stuff. Here are my personal notes. Maybe you guys can take some value from it.

    6 Days With TheCostOfSuccess (Cosy)


    - you make her go through the different stages of emotions

    - you need to go through the stages from creepy, platonic, talkative, sexual to authentic

    - the worse the state the less compliance you get

    - women have a sixth sense for in which state a guy is in

    - they see all the potentials and risks, both positive and negative

    - it all comes down to the skill of changing her emotions, best is: you pace and lead emotions

    - get a feel for what she wants at that particular moment. Is she feeling a little uncomfortable? Then it‘s comfort (use a soothing voice, calm her down, connect with her on easy topics). Is she smiling and having fun? Make it flirty and funny.

    - women know that they are emotionally put in the state that the guy around them is, that‘s why they always choose the better party and get rid of negativity quickly

    hardly any man understands what it is like to be a woman, to be constantly going through all these emotional stages

    first open her up, then make her submissive (being intense, qualification, sexual)

    try to connect instead of being gamey

    make her feel good emotions talking to you

    generally flirting with a girl is like „Heißer Draht“. If you are too uncomfortable, too tense, too needy, too boring you end up at the Draht and loose. The better your vibe is , the bigger the Öse becomes

    Generally I need to work on my warmth and the ability to connect with people. Make them feel at ease and make them feel good to talk to me. Make it easy for them!

    You want to be as supportive as you can for the woman to go in a connection with you!

    Become a good conversationalist, so you can hook them in with your verbals! Cosy doesn‘t need spectacular verbals to draw them in. Basic stuff with the right vibing and energy behind it is enough. Even with low energy. Just create a flow, a common vibe with her.

    - if you are really captivating, you can create attraction just with the right vibe and very, very basic small talk (with presence and tension, facial expressions, relaxation). => e.g. cosy with the Polish girl. You can create sexual tension, a copenonnection, a feeling just with the most basic small talk. Its just a shift in your mind from „attracting“ them to connecting with them (don‘t go in from emotional distance, but from proximity as far as she allows. Even if you talk to her about distant subject you can be close)

    view her as a flower and you are the gardener who‘s task is to make her shine


    - open playful skeptical, don‘t reveal too much interest with your vibe/subcommunications

    - open playful like a boxer, seizing her out (playfully skeptical smile)

    - try to be as little polarizing as possible in the beginning

    - be curious about her, keep the conversation warm, relaxing, easy and supportive for her

    - build rapport with her with uncontroversial topics, but don‘t seek rapport!

    e.g. Polish Milf

    - building tension and sitting down like a playful child (= grabbing attention)

    - very soft voice, making her feel at ease

    what do you do for work?“

    I‘m a graphic designer“

    ah, that‘s cool if you can get a job“

    what are you doing?“

    She put her attention on Cosy because he was giving her the warmer and easier invite for a conversation. She put up a barrier (I am on the way to my boyfriend at this table top shop). So one would have to connect over a platonic conversation (not a platonic vibe!)

    Make it really comfortable for her to talk to you with no pressure at all!

    She puts up a barrier? Recognize it and ship around it.

    Warming her up

    Before you can talk and flirt to her you often have to warm her up and get rid of her resistance towards you. See the barrier she puts up in front of you and playfully get around it. Let‘s say she is not ready to be sexual yet then you have to get her to the point by spiking her emotions, make her giggly and bubbly and then be sexy intense. Don‘t be affected by it, make it warm and allow her to open up. When she is warmed up, you can escalate the vibe (until the next point of resistance).

    Intense vs. Playful

    You have to mix the two and always calibrate to which state she is in right now. If she is not receptive it‘s a big mistake to be intense. Instead make it playful until she warms up, lowers her guard and then you can mix in intense vibes.

    If you want her to warm up, you have to be warm yourself. This can be accomplished for instance by a kind of warm, naive, childish vibe that makes her feel at ease and comfortable around you.

    If you show too much interest for the current state she is in, she will probably reject you. You didn‘t pace and lead her through the right emotions.

    Put her in a bubbly, giggly state. Then turn it into a submissive state.


    Austrian psychology girl in the club.

    She rejected me (smiling, => token resistance) at the first approach.

    The second time I got her smiling, then drew her in a funny, flirty conversation.

    When she was open (lowered her guard), I pulled her in and made it sexual.

    How to grab attention?

    Do it with tension, like a police officer that wants you to stop. He first uses tension to get your attention. (= also like RSD Julien does it. Authority voice and then soft „hi“)


    Connect with her

    1. See what state she is in at the moment

    2. Adress that state by the right actions (don‘t ask for too much compliance for that state)

    3. Pace the state with warmness then lead her to the next one. (=show an understanding of her world)

    4. Find out what she is like and what she needs (teasing, comfort, adventure, dominance, connecting etc.). Probe for it like a boxer. Throw in something light. Works? Go for more.

    5. Provide that what she needs to her.

    6. Make her feel good talking to you.

    Nobody understands them thats why it is so powerful to undertand their reality

    Generally: Focus on her and be present with her!

    Don‘t come from a point of distance to her. Assume familiarity but also be emotionally close to her. Don‘t be a stranger.

    Show an understanding of her.

    Make it relevent for her so it is easy to connect. (with the parfume girl: talk about job stuff and flirt along the line. So it is easy for her!)

    you have to be openyourself (=in one of the better states) to be able to have the warmth to connect with her

    it‘s about making the conncetion so close that sex is inevitable

    The dutch guy on our bar night was not particularly attractive but managed to build a nice connection with the hot Portugese girl. He put in a lot of fun and good emotions and escalated on them. So the connection was nice and he could have fucked her if he had game. Just because of the fact that he was very warm with his vibe and connecting with her well. Connection = compliance

    Strength/Value vs. Warmth/Comfort

    Without warmth there is no connection between the two of you. Most girls then have a guard and intentionally cut tension. But without tension there is only attraction and not arousal!

    Be super warm so you make it extremely easy to talk and connect to you (you can also be super strong at the same time, like dad would be)


    Find out what kind of resistance she has. She‘s on the street feeling uncomfortable? Make her feel at ease by being calm, smiling, joking, soft voice, enough distance etc.

    She is skeptical about you on a date? Find out why and solve that. For instance she thinks you are a player and just want to fuck her? Give her specific reasons why you like her and what makes her special for you (show curiosity in her).


    You always want to mix in tension. Don‘t break it! But calibrate it to her level of comfort. She less comfortable she is with you the less tension you can use.

    Always build as much tension as possible. Dive into it.

    Set with the parfume girl

    When being with hired guns you can usually not just do direct game with them.

    So ask yourself:

    How can I start a connection with her? It‘s probably with her job!

    Cosy‘s way.

    Approached the parfume girl and asks for what area in the shop she is selling. Then mix in some warm questions like where she is from etc. See how receptive she is or if she needs some playfulness to warm up. Don‘t compliment her if she is not open enough yet!

    He then starts flirting (and connecting) with her based on the job she is doing!

    This shows social intelligence as he needs to consider what she is obliged to do right now (sell parfumes) and combines this with warming her up, being curious about her and being playful enough to not make it uncomfortable.

    If you mix anything with playfulness it becomes WARMER and way easier to connect with.

    I failed with my girl because I did not adress her work mode (warm her up with playful stuff etc.) but just escalated with a compliment => blow-out

    Opening cautiosly

    If you do not open with loads of tension and direct interest you can gauge the level of interest and the emotional stage where she is in right now and then act accordingly.

    When you open slow and take your time (say „hi“ first and then „how is it going“) you can see how open she is etc. and calibrate to it better because you have more time!

    Move like a boxer that is playfully trying to figure out his opponent.

    Sex talk

    Girls live in this state of abundance. They can get sex all the time but they don‘t know what the right way is to good sex. So by understanding this and showing it to her and also setting yourself up as a sexual prize this is gold.

    I am not looking for sex“ Routine: Yeep, that‘s right. I am over that phase of getting just sex. I want to have good sex. That‘s usually the case when you have a strong connection with someone. It‘s like sex then is more than just sex. It‘s more like a sharing a special moment with someone.

    In the club

    Blonde guy who behaved like a male stripper

    girlfriend of the brunette guy LOVED it, she even danced with him and got sexual tension with him in front of her boyfriend.

    What was good about him? He was super playful, exaggerating shit. So he was disarming his sexuality, making it warm and comfortable.

    He was also 100% pure fun, self-amused not seeking any outcome or reaction (at least not obvious)

    The guys that were outright rejected were those that WANTED something from the girls.

    on the dancefloor girls love guys who can let loose. Because it makes them do the same and feel awesome.

    Asshole rockstar

    It is not not necessarily about distancing yourself from her. It is about having seen it all, being carefree and above the process. It is a state of pure relaxation, (over)confidence and outcome dependence.

    Be super warm and a little arrogant


    Use the right techniques according to the state she is in right now. Don‘t use techniques that require too much compliance or a different state of emotions. Like obvious prize framing to a not warmed up girl is useless.

    Or self-deprication to a girl that doesn‘t see you as valuable.

    Different strategies

    Wild Spirit



    Different Vibes




    Failed set with the two Russian hotties

    Blonde girl put up a front. So then see an opportunity for connection. The friend was open, connect with her and then tease the friend from there. Like for example:

    If you open with „hi“ and then slowly let her know what you are after, you can see her reaction and calibrate. You could have seen that her guard is up but her friend‘s isn‘t. So switch the friend like: yeah my plan was to talk to you and then switch to your friend that opens up then. Worked fine, see? Then tease the first girl by talking to the second girl. „Hey, I gotta tell you a story about a blonde girl I met today. She was such a pain in the ass!“

    Friendly method

    Start with something friendly and easy to relate to (you appear on her radar with low risk!) = you have low risk verbals but it‘s an exchange of energies and looks that counts! Create a friendly atmosphere that makes it easy to flirt

    Make them giggly bubbly

    Then make them submissive (sex talk, qualification etc)

    Use sex talk to paint a future with them

    Slowly move forward whilst never disconnecting from her. Only use power plays on her if she uses them on you

    With girls that work: spike her out of her work mode everytime you see her

    1. Open

    2. Remove obstacles

    3. Make her feel comfortable

    4. Inject sexuality

    Be playful and when resistance is gone, add sexuality


    What is really powerful is to change between intense and giggly/bubbly all the time. => Playful flirty, then intense and sexual. Then again playful flirty.

    what is her interest, what does SHE want?

    Nobody understands them thats why it is so powerful to undertand their reality

    put the minto a giggly, bubbly

    submissive state

    try to connect instead of being gamey

    always find plausible deniability (touching her etc)

    connect with her

    cosy in the club with the blonde

    despite no IOIs

    do it playful childish (= easy to connect)

    make her feel good talking to you

    use curiosity

    hook the conversation important skill

    counter player objection with athentic curiosity

    close the distance, but better: let there be no distance from the beginning

    ignore her beauty

    girls love guys in that flow state

    asshole rockstar is inner feeling

    in the club (dancefloor): warm her up, playful childish, then escalate the vibe

    be close dont make it a big of a deal

    be cautios at the beginning, almost dumb and childish and innocent

  • #2
    how was cost of success game overall ,witness any crazy shit and on average how hot were the ladies ??? hes an enigma for sure !!!


    • #3
      You did a good job with your notes xD
      You got what seems like all of it down
      And put it down in a way that makes sense

      I doubt he'd say he witnessed crazy shit
      Just good basics, like strong hooks, and girls getting all smiley

      I feel like, it was about him overcoming that phase of being too gamey, vs being a real man with girls
      Going from insecure to secure
      And noticing the difference in how it is approached

      So for example, if you feel insecure you need to get more compliance in a situation than a girls state allows
      But if you improve her state you can then spike the arousal while keeping it low key, because this is a secure approach the girl then allows you to act more casual about touches etc

      Most guys are... either naive like the dutch guy we met (who created warmth but had no ability to close)
      Or insecure... like being too distant or asking for too much too soon (but can close if the girl is green enough)

      You want to be secure (and close to her in a relaxed way) aswell as create warmth (but dispell notions of naivety with your social skill and being in tune with her)

      That way you give across a stronger impression to her that you aren't non-sensically after sex
      But still appealling all the same, due to being a different breed of guy

      This adds a kind of stronger force to what is done
      Which is probably what he saw I'm guessing
      That kind of fixation of the girl, or easy feeling in her smile

      Its such a small thing... but also hugely important as it is a whole other level of game (going from pinning the tail on the donkey to progressively improving your position with a girl).

      I like these notes man,


      • Dr Feelgood

        Dr Feelgood

        Editing a comment
        very helpful reply, thumbs up!

    • #4
      Originally posted by Grodmeister General View Post
      how was cost of success game overall ,witness any crazy shit and on average how hot were the ladies ??? hes an enigma for sure !!!
      I doubt that he has problems getting hot girls. his game is very ungamey. It's innocent, light and the right amount of tension. what was new for me is that he doesn't talk to girls, he connects.
      I saw a quote under a hot russian girl's instagram post:

      "To have someone understand your mind is different kind of intimacy".

      That is what was new for me. Creating rapport, a deep connection, intimacy from the first second WITHOUT seeming try-hard, needy. Just authentically curious. To put it in technical terms: he goes in without polarizing, without breaking rapport, just super low-key, demanding very little compliance and making it as easy as possible for the girl to talk to him while being totally aware of what the girl in front of him "needs". As cheesy as it sounds: that's not pickup. that's seduction.

      about that enigmatic writing style: yea, I didn't understand half of what he was writing before. but now I think it's a solid 80% :P

      edit: his philosophy is not necessarily to escalate (correct me if I am wrong) but to connect as strong as possible. That doesn't mean that it is necessarily 100% different. but it's way smoother.


      • #5
        btw: I implemented that "connection"/warmth stuff (instead of subconsciously trying to create a value gap between us) when I came back to my home country and the first two girls that I was casually talking to started kino on me and telling me how "nice" I am lol.


        • #6
          did you see this work on the 8 pluses dr feelgood .....i believe that warming up you refer to is the stimulus part in osca model and its usually after the opener ..but i wonder about skipping ca and just seeking rapport and not using negs how that works on those 8 pluses! but this post is more so a costofsuccess demystified !!!


          • Grodmeister General
            Editing a comment
            this game you run reminds me of RSD game but the difference is ..rsd is into pumping buying temp (at least with rsders ive seen) and not focused on connection pump the buying temp but focus more so on connection ....3sr my game colgates etc generate tension with negs (not sexuality like your game and rsd) and use stories for attraction and qaulifying to repair the damage your neg caused in open ..then comfort ...!!!

          • thecostofsuccess


            Editing a comment
            There are many purposes to feints beyond switching your punch. You step in when you strike when you box. So the feint establishes footwork when a guy stops reacting to the feint because youve taken a step and he hasnt stepped back.
            Generally any motion you do a guy will react, he'll drift out of range cuz people arent stupid and dont wanna get hit, if they plant themselves this then helps you get in on them and you are able to hit them slightly faster (since the footwork is already done).
            If you don't use footwork to your advantage you wont even be close enough to hit so even if its just your feet getting in, its an advantage.

            It can also be used to make them back up, and not plant. It can be used to make them put up a guard so you can start a combination or change of angle, it can be used to make them show what plans they have (you think they are set up to counter for example), it can be used to change your rhythm to a half beat from a full beat. It can be used defensiely, offensively, as a set up, or as a way to pin in the corner.
            Its a versatile probing move, not simply to fake the direction of the punch.

            Often its only many layers in that you can land another shot off a feint. After setting them up for it and making their reaction to it predictable. More immediately feints are used to get things you wouldn't normally get, timing wise and positionally. Its incorrect to say its just to punch from another angle, sure its what spectators see but not what you do as a boxer.

            You seem exceptionally antagonistic or simply unaware of foot movement in boxing if you can't pick up on the fact I was using feints in the broader sense of its use as a set up.

            I like talking boxing though.
            But yeah, my point was just that you can achieve something while not technically achieving anything.
            The achievement being getting closer to her without her pulling away.

            As in... her not pulling away from you sexually is enough to actually create sexuality. IF you know how to use it.
            While if you do nothing, and she doesnt react, its because you did nothing.

            So her "not reacting" isnt NOTHING if you accomplish something with it like acceptance of a frame or feeling about you.
            Youve set up the underlying frames of sexuality without having to commit to it and get countered.

            example: "ha, im not like that" and then winning her over with a cool vibe
            causes her to think "he probably is like that though, but maybe in a different way, ill look for how he does it different then"
            so you showed no sexuality, and her not reacting was actually a huge reaction that caused her to catagorise you differently like she does guys she wants
            so it established sexuality ... but not by me showing it that much

          • Grodmeister General
            Editing a comment
            I dont know a decent boxer who gets outta punching range to avoid getting hurt , the idea also isnt to think offense then defense or defense then offense its blended its thought of, while you are punching , to think of being defensive ( feinting to set up an opening ) then thinkin of your offense is not the way......the idea of putting up a high guard(creating openings in other areas of the body ,mainly the hook that goes around the high guard and body hooks) is what i was saying what feinting does , I am aware of closing distance ..double jabs. shift punching leaping lead hooks etc...stick and move style pretty footwork boxing is mad overrated in boxing!!!

            but seduction is not like that all or pick up its not foot in the door ,you make it sound like shes an opponent or oppose to you having sex with her , the idea is she wants or even better she chases you to make sex happens , boxing cant work that way cuz at no point my opponent is gonna want me to knock him out lol.

            as for your example

            if you are saying " im not like that " you probably answering a shit test incorrectly (should not have heard that in first place) or you are letting her steer the convo too much

            I dont follow your example of her wanting to be sexual with me for not being sexual!

        • #7
          Originally posted by Dr Feelgood View Post

          he doesn't talk to girls, he connects.
          I saw a quote under a hot russian girl's instagram post:

          "To have someone understand your mind is different kind of intimacy".

          That is what was new for me. Creating rapport, a deep connection, intimacy from the first second WITHOUT seeming try-hard, needy. Just authentically curious. To put it in technical terms: he goes in without polarizing, without breaking rapport, just super low-key, demanding very little compliance and making it as easy as possible for the girl to talk to him while being totally aware of what the girl in front of him "needs". As cheesy as it sounds: that's not pickup. that's seduction.

          Good shit


        • #8
          Originally posted by Grodmeister General View Post
          did you see this work on the 8 pluses dr feelgood .....i believe that warming up you refer to is the stimulus part in osca model and its usually after the opener ..but i wonder about skipping ca and just seeking rapport and not using negs how that works on those 8 pluses! but this post is more so a costofsuccess demystified !!!
          The only 8+ I saw (I have ridiculously high standards in terms of who's a 10) were a) two super hot russian girls and b) one girl from marocco/tunisia/algeria (my guess). they outright rejected me (it was on the street). he had some very good ideas what I should've done differently. To be clear: I think that his game is very rapport-based but that doesn't mean that he would game every girl the same way trying to build rapport from the get go. He is super aware of which mood, state etc. a girl is in just by looking at her. He just seem to know what a girl needs at that very moment.

          apart from that he hooked different girls in various situations (parfume girl in a shopping mall, girl on the street, girl in the club standing, girl in the club with her group). and it looked super easy. and yes, I wouldn't have minded fucking them haha

          personally what was an eye-opener for me (I am not that club experienced) is that I did two sets in the club. both rejected me. then I was observing the whole club for a lot of time, looking for what guys did who got good responses and what guys did that got negative ones. then it clicked for me. I knew that I had to adress her current state that she is in. and boom: the girl that rejected me opened up towards me (because we matched vibe/energy wise, then I paced and lead her to open up and injected sexual tension. boom!

          now that is super basic stuff. but I didn't get it before lol. that you have to adjust to her openness (which was low because she had that guard up completely). the more closed off she is the more innocent / playfully skeptical you get in. that was an eye-opener for me because i am just a fucking bulldozer lol. just go for the green ones and then do my usual thing with them. but I am really bad at overcoming initial resistance.


          • #9
            thank you for sharing

            some good angles on things youve captured and gave words to. provided a different angle on some things for me which helps.
            Heard you not the type that you take home to mom

            Glows Log


            • #10

              Found this video relates to this stuff quite well

              Ok, so I'll try to convert what he says into seduction stuff.
              There are like 4 or 5 things he says
              - Yes is always a trap, you get people saying yes to you and it is like they have someone whispering in their ear you are out to get them
              - Youd be amazed what people will say no to, ask a person a no based question and they will think clearly and honestly on the question
              - If you have only 3-10 seconds show you know what a persons situation is so they say "thats right" as thats how they will come to respect you and like dealing with you
              - Dont ever be fooled by "you are right" because its a way to get rid of you

              Basically, most guys are asking for a yes from a girl for sex. So don't make your game about an eventual "yes to sex", but more of a "would it be so bad with this guy?" and her being like "no way". And start out with the girl being like "thats right!", and showcasing an understanding of her situation, without going too far and getting her to say "YOU are right" because thats just placation. The idea is that by her feeling like "thats right" as you are talking she'll give you more time, and by not trapping her into a yes or a "you are right" shes not having to waste mental clarity on defending herself so she can participate.

              Well, when its about girls, you gotta know the first issue is
              "why the fuck do guys talk to me" and girls know why, and they flower it up, like "maybe its also cuz im awesome, or they ignore me when im ugly, but mostly they want sex, though maybe its arrogant to think that is always the case"
              So my first thought is like "how do we address the introduction so she feels awesome, not ugly, humble about my intentions, and like a guy approaching her right now is a good thing?"
              -body language is tempremental or impulsive (humility)
              -smile/nature is warm (aint him callin me ugly)
              -confident introductions (approaching seems totally natural and socially healthy)

              So by the time shes read all those meanings in how Ive said, shes at ease because she feels ive addressed her reality. Not started by pushing my reality on her about how she ought to talk to me cuz I deserve sex and she ought to say yes cuz Im actually hot but she hasnt given it the time of day yet. Those are all bothersome things, annoying.

              I actually am more like "well its totally possible you dont like me, but approaching makes sense because we never know how well we can connect until we try and if we dont connect with people... we stay home alone and thats kinda sad"
              So a girl is more like "yeah fuck, thats right, I respect you for that"

              ... so in the start I'm not even getting anywhere near sex, though obviously you cant escape sex... its on her mind...
              as soon as you are on her radar of guys shes thinking "what is my response? ignore, bait a little to find out a lil more? or sculpt this situation to get him on board"
              Shes not going to sculpt the situation in your favor if she thinks you are a common prick out for a fuck, at best she'll bait you to hear more or wait it out.
              Shes only going to sculpt the situation if you are supportive and shes feeling that "thats right" mood with you.

              Then you guys are relating to each other on sex by proxy of relating on how to talk to each other. You arent pushing her into commitments or being a shit, and shes like "thats right, fuck yeah, respect!". And sexually shes thinking "would it be so bad if??? if we hooked up", and all you need to do is be sort of a bit sexy near her, way you position your body with hers, tone of voice, eye contact glimmers. And all of a sudden shes thinking "no way it would be bad with this guy, so if im going to risk something on sex, its not a bad way to go".

              I used to operate differently, getting girls to say "you are the hottest guy ive ever fuckin met holy shit why are you even talking to me? i dont deserve this"
              But I got really hurt by that... a girl loved me like that... and I watched it totally destroy her... her paranoia and fear, so intense shed cry on the floor.
              Its was fucked...

              Sooooooooo... I don't go at it like that. I make myself easy to handle and easy to relate to. With a supportive smile and a good convo. Cuz I know the girl just needs to feel heard anyway. And everyone is searching for a good feeling... happiness... freedom... something.
              Sex is one of those options we all have available... what matters is the choices we make with it, and I'm not out to decieve a girl or make her make bad fuckin choices.
              So I'll not push my shit on her, I'll get her like "thats right", understand her (life aint perfect I dont believe her view is all roses)
              And when shes like "you are on point", I let her know my feelings and stuff about sex, and how I see her.

              Like "I feel you have an understanding of what it means to not commit people to stuff, but to live in the moment"
              And its not a sales pitch, I'm just letting HER know, that I'm connecting with her for that emotional reason, not just some blanket statement of sex.

              So when you chat to a girl there are tons of things flowing through her head... unless shes a dull bulb (some are)
              So you dont trick your way, you just get her like "fuck thats right" and be on the same page as you
              And you disarm asd traps n stuff.

              Create a lil arousal as you talk, keeping it all fun and interesting. Roleplay if the girl is particularly in a powerplaying mode.

              But essentially, people are asking "how can you help me"
              Annnnd, if your answer is a resume of shit of why you are so badass no one cares.
              So you relate to them, and they are like "oh shit yeah"

              She'll get to sexual thoughts, you just need to be relaxed as fuck about it so you dont give off despperate vibes n shit, then you can make your moves with your voice and body language and proximity, the vibe etc, convo topics.

              Like Ill talk about the philosophy behind kissing and stuff, about how some girls make out with 10 guys a night and its innocent, I understand it. But joke that every dude thinks however thats leading to sex, so 9 out of ten guys are embarassingly wrong :P, and wonder about why only 10% of girls go home with them :P.

              Just funny fun shit that girls are like "oh yeah, really, I think thats probably true".
              And get her to share her view, then share mine non chalantly.

              She'll tie it to "would he be that bad a choice, ive got time this month, but dunno who im going with, or if im going solo this month"
              Then you just be like "god its refreshing to talk like this" n stuff, and get her in the mood and the choice will become easier and easier and more natural.

              Im not trying to get a yes out of her, or change who she is, or cause her to make a mistake or say Im right and follow me like Im gospel.

              You feel me?

              Its like her choice to bed a guy is... arrived at... not predefined.
              If I shortcut the answer its gonna be no
              If I support the answers for her, its going to be a gladness and happiness all around her choice


              • thecostofsuccess


                Editing a comment
                sounds like shes lowering her conscious participation, which is a neutral sign (pulling away or stiffening up would be bad). You can't just move up the chain with that. If she wants to kiss her head will sort of rotate as she breathes a little heavier.
                In these cases you want to either touch where you are BETTER so it turns her on, or stop for a second and sort of set up a kiss by talking/whispering in her ear (ear then eyecontact, then triangle gaze as you make your voice sexy)
                Gotta remember that each touch sort of has its own conditions... so you unlock them individually, unlocking a high level one doesnt necessarily unlock em all
                In fact, her grabbing your dick can be a way for her to lock you out from sex.
                Its about her then sort of losing herself to it

                As for a book on it... its super fuckin tricky
                there isnt just one way to do everything... or one way to percieve it all
                I miiiiiiiiight be able to write such a book on physical parts of game, but
                seems like a nightmare

                I dunno Ill keep it in mind though

              • glow


                Editing a comment
                lol. Just tried the emphatic response as the first one (providing insight into whats in front of him within the first 10 sec) to a photographer i spoke to. Then giving him a clear path of action to resolve it.

                Effect was very clear. the* guy calmed down as i spoke to him and was thankfully expressing it directly.

                Afterwards the guy offered me free work on a picture ive asked him about for work.

                Beyond the freebie its cool to help people this way. Just fun to see.

              • SargeMaximus


                Editing a comment
                @cosy: yeah it’s odd because when I told her to sit beside me she put her left leg over my right one so her leg was between my crotch. But when going for a kiss she said it was too intimate.

            • #11
              Excellent video metaphor, Cosy.
              "That's right!""
              And, another essential point (goal?): no matter if the other party got what they thought they wanted, they should be willing to deal with you again. Hint: they got something better than what they were looking for. He even applies it to himself in the beginning of the speech: "Never be so sure of what you want that you wouldn't take something better."
              Awesome stuff!


              • #12
                Am I the only one who needs to read Cosy's stuff only once to 100% "get it"?
                Guess guys have very different brains when it comes to understanding aspects of seduction.

                Great thread anyway, thx for sharing!
                personal blog:


                • #13
                  Thanks Cosy, this was an amazing post!