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Explaining something I've never been able to before about attraction

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  • Explaining something I've never been able to before about attraction

    Ok so recently due to some theory I created for other skills I came across a way to describe something about attraction

    It requires you understand the idea of favoritism
    So like you watch a boxing match and you think one guy is winning just out of an inherent bias you have towards that person
    And you have a lack of bias towards the other guy so expect little or nothing from him

    Well with girls, they have a sort of bias towards certain guys, and your job is to kind of shift that bias through the course of conversation
    If you try to change it directly it is confrontational and "loser like" so you'll alienate the girl, so you need a confidence in how you can change her bias in your own way
    Having the confidence to win her favoritism and alter her biases as you talk is kind of what you are doing

    Now, that isnt all of the picture, there are two other concepts
    - accuracy
    - liberation

    So if you change her bias but its all a lie or some convoluted plot or illusion, the inaccuracy of the bias she has will create envy, jealousy etc (so actually inaccuracy can help when social proofing depending on its use, but typically you wanna be accurate but its a high risk thing to do)
    And then there is liberty...

    You can win her favor and do it accurately, but still be a stick in the mud, a heavy draining force that corrodes away at her spirit and emotions.
    So you want to be light hearted and free.

    My strongest trait is liberty, I don't corrode away at girls, I'm super light.
    Then I act in accurate ways... (if she calls me generous, and manly shed be right)
    Until finally I think of my way to alter her bias in particular regarding me

    So yeah thats kind of an explaination of what i do

  • #2
    Great stuff!


    • #3
      Doesn't this all pre-suppose the girl doesn't favor you? Isn't that a weak frame to operate from?


      • #4
        Originally posted by SargeMaximus View Post
        Doesn't this all pre-suppose the girl doesn't favor you? Isn't that a weak frame to operate from?
        Depends on the girl and the situation. Most cases she wont cuz she has no reason to. There are very specific triggers that typically cause girls to favor you. Typically her getting to know you arent a dude "who is an idiot" is a good start.
        Showing your fun side, etc

        You can do this by being seen laughing and having fun with people (not even her)
        Or by having a nice vibe to you that really matches up with her feeling of how you feel to her too

        Is it weak... no
        Its socially adept to know who favors you and who doesn't
        Winning over this bias is what charm is
        And how heirarchies form
        And its just a reality that when chicks dunno who you are they will feel neutral
        Even if thinking you are attractive, they will probably still be neutral

        My actual frame regarding it is that usually girls will just know if I talk to them a bit because my accuracy and liberation are high
        So, I know I'm very easy to be around so she has no reason to kick up a fuss if I talk to her
        and secondly, I know I'm a "real man" that they typically are yearning to meet (sure most of the time they are cool about it, if not a little cold, or even fearful but, but they want to meet a cool guy)

        So I know I deserve the bias
        But that it is typically more... fickle, than is the truth.
        A girl will not look at me and see my soul.
        She will not rate me accurately from first glance.
        And finally when we break up, she wont rate me accurately either.
        Her bias will shift to other guys etc.

        I don't think of the bias as mine or anything, I just know it exists, and that without it a girl cant feel enthusiastic about her own life.
        Like a good book has a hook, good attractions also create that inherent bias while participating that makes you think "yeah thisll be good"

        Its why sex talk is so fn effective
        And why in physical game, you need tension and vibe

        1 - sex talk causes a girl to remove resistances and that causes a feeling of optimism which is very similar to her having a bias towards you (but its even better than that cause of reasons I gave in my explaining verbals post)
        2 - physical game and the tension you build up towards in creating a bubble etc, communicates shit like "he has an awesome aura, i can feel he gets girls and feeels so good"... similar to how a fireplace might just win you over on a cold night when you see it

        bias is like the dark side of winning over a girls optimism
        her sort of... unrealistic side... her anger and disappointment DRIVING HER towards her own blindspots and fears, in the form of hope and belief in certain figures
        as soon as you share that spotlight... you are "in" (and also one day it'll break or shatter)

        Personally the strongest frame is to not care if you are in it or not, and just talk to girls casually without it
        So many guys wanna win girls over it can be cool if you dont care much
        BUT even cooler if you actually can win her over without effort, like the glint in your eyes or some off handed comment that gets her like "shiiiit.... this guy!"

        If youve known a girl a long time and shes slotted you as mr. friend or whatever
        Its just a difference in bias
        So if you maintain awareness of it, you can just relax, knowing that biases change with certain triggers

        So in a way, its actually confident to be aware of her biases. Its the whole "girl code" thing and intuition thing in a nutshell
        I know I'm not explaining it super clearly
        It is an idea in its infancy.
        Just hoping to flesh it out some more here

        One thing to note though, is girls I call heartachers, are heartachers BECAUSE their biases are very very strong and very fickle
        almost to a point of willful ignorance, it'll strike your heart as they randomly change positions on you
        at first theyll be so against you, you feel your heart is in a pit of coals talking to her, with her hawkish gaze on you
        then theyll so flippantly and inconsiderately change to a very cool nature (not aware the temp change is like going from a sauna to a fucking ice pond)
        then theyll go so deep and judge you based on their insecurities it'll creep you out cuz you see their baggage/damage
        then they'll casually switch to being breezy

        And all the while you are just expected to not notice any of it.
        But you do (or at least I do)

        Heartachers arent particularly hard to win over, they just thrash around a lot in a way that fucks with you
        Youll end up getting headbutted in the nose if you arent careful (metaphorically speaking)

        Normal girls are generally easy to win over without much drama. So long as you can talk their language
        And walk the talk


        • SargeMaximus


          Editing a comment
          Yeah I know the heartachers type. I got one in the Air bnb right now. It’s a turn off tbh.

          What you’re saying here is mostly what I want to learn: how to just get the girls effortlessly preferring me. You’re right, most guys try to hit the triggers, me, I actively avoid and try NOT to hit the triggers, mostly because women going crazy over me then leaving me is a traumatic experience.