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Full Percentage Breakdowns of Women I've Slept With and Had Relationships With

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  • Full Percentage Breakdowns of Women I've Slept With and Had Relationships With

    A few of you have asked me to post another State of the Union. Yeah, I haven't done one of those in a very long time. There are several reasons I haven't done one lately but at some point I'll get around to doing an abbreviated new version. I'm a little more well known these days than back when I used to do those kinds of posts, and I don't mind you knowing about my sex life, but I need to be a little sensitive regarding the anonymity of the women in my life. Most of them never asked to become quasi-internet celebrities. Even anonymous ones.

    But! In the meantime, I can give you the next best thing. Since everything I do I track on spreadsheets, I can give you some very detailed information on the women I've been with and the relationships I've had in percentage form. This way I can give you very accurate information without worrying about violating the privacy of any women I've been with.

    I was going over my spreadsheets the other day and had some fun crunching some of the numbers. Before you ask, no, I’m not going to tell you have many women I’ve slept with. That would just create arguments (which would waste my time). But what I can tell you, in very precise numbers, is the demographic and relationship breakdown percentages of every woman I’ve ever dated or had sex with. I thought the numbers were interesting, and many of them surprised me.

    All percentages are rounded to the nearest whole number, but other than that they are 100% accurate unless I made an error somewhere.

    PART ONE: DEMOGRAPHICS

    First, we'll start with the demographic information:

    Ages

    18-19 34%
    20-23 14%
    24-29 21%
    30-33 9%
    34-45 20%
    46+ 2%

    Very interesting. That means that half (48%) of all the women I’ve slept with in my life were between the ages of 18 and 23, and 100% of those women were after I turned 36 years old, since prior to that I had always dated older women. Wow.

    Races

    American White 77%
    Asian or Mixed Asian 12%
    Black or Mixed Black 8%
    Russian / Eastern European White 6%
    Latina 3%

    For you math nerds, these percentages add up to a little more than 100%, and that’s because of some of the mixed women being counted twice.

    Again, I was surprised. I thought I had slept with more Asians. Interesting.

    Hair Color

    I only counted white women in this (since all Asians and Latinas have dark hair).

    Blondes 48%
    Brunettes 34%
    Redheads 10%
    Black 7%

    Blondes clearly over-represented, which is good. Blondes are by far my favorite so this made sense.

    Kids

    Women with kids 50%
    Women without kids 50%

    A literal 50/50 split. Note that "Women without kids" represents women who did not have kids when I first started dating them. Over the years, some of these women have indeed had kids in the interim. (With other men of course.) More on these women in a minute.

    PART TWO: RELATIONSHIPS

    Here are some percentages related to my experience in relationships:

    Number of women who I slept with more than twice who returned after a LSNFTE: 94.4%

    Average length of LSNFTE before return: 19 months

    Longest LSNFTE: 3.5 years

    Shortest LSFNTE: 2 weeks

    Percentage of women whose LSNFTE included an actual marriage (and divorce!) to another man prior to returning: 17%

    Percentage of women whose LSNFTE included having a baby with another man prior to returning: 34%

    Relationship Types

    FB 50%
    MLTR 50%

    Seriously, that really was the breakdown...another 50/50 split. Very interesting! That really didn't tell me much so I broke out the categories a little further to give things a little more context:

    Pure sex-only FB 30%
    Close FB (deep, close friendship) 20%
    MLTR 35%
    Very Serious MLTR (OLTR candidate) 15%
    OLTR 0%

    So only 30% of the ongoing relationships I’ve had were just about sex. The other 70% meant more to me. 15% meant everything to me (I was either fully in love with the woman or very close to it, contemplating full OLTR). No woman has “graduated” to full OLTR status yet, which is a little disappointing but still okay. I’m in no rush.

    Those are the numbers I thought might be useful.

    I think the most useful number to you guys above is the average length of the LSNFTE before a woman returned, which is the first time I have calculated such a thing. It's 19 months. That means that on average a woman will wait one year and seven months before you get to play with her again, and that's assuming you're doing everything right (which most men do not). That means you must be very patient, always be having sex with other women, always be putting in the numbers, always maintain strong outcome independence, never get oneitis, never get needy, never put all your sexual eggs in one basket, and almost never put all of your emotional eggs in one basket. Just relax, enjoy yourself, fuck other women, focus on your Mission, completely ignore her while she plays Disney with her new TEMPORARY boyfriend or husband, and eventually she'll be back. 94.4% of the time to be exact.

    If there are other breakdowns you're curious about, just ask and I'll do my best.
    How to have 3 hour meet-to-lays and nonmonogamous relationships with any type of woman:
    The Blackdragon Blog

  • #2
    Wow, super-interesting breakdown, BD. Thanks!

    I particularly find the length of time the LSNFTE (19 mos.) and ratio (aqlmost 95%!) of value.

    This means that as long as my neediness management skills and patience is kept sharp I have no real statistical basis for worrying about any one particular woman, or as Tubarao always says: "No next is permanent".

    Which correlates completely with my own experience over the years.

    Also agree that as an older guy, going after the young girls of 18-23 has a much higher probability of success than women my own age.

    Great!!

    Comment


    • #3
      Cool to know you score so many teenagers at your age, means I still have some time to learn game to score prime girls.

      I was shocked to see so many girls with kids!! Seriously, huh?? I think I can count on one hand (maybe two) how many girls I've slept with that had kids. Naturally you have a higher % of 30+ women, but still at least 2/7 of 18-29 year olds you laid had kids.
      Maybe that's part of the territory of doing so much online game?

      I'm curous: how many girls you sleep with you sleep with at least twice, and how many for at least 1 month?

      I have some of these stats myself, I'll share tonight.

      Comment


      • #4
        Always good to see some hard stats on the board BD. Thanks for a very interesting post.

        You highlight your LSNFTE return figures, which I always thought was a remarkable outlier. I don't disagree about the need for patience and outcome independence, but I think that there are a number of factors which come in play for you to make that statistic so high.

        - You do online, rather than say night game. If I look at my rather small number of online lays, the LSNFTE return percentage is above 50%. For other women, I would guess it to be less that 20%.

        - You live somewhere where people get married young, have babies young, get divorced young. Contrast with the majority of my female friends and lovers I have stayed in contact with, many of whom are getting married later, having kids with the guy they married, and probably won't start getting divorced until they reach their 40s. These women are conducting relationships over much longer timescales. That 50% of your women had children serves to highlight the huge differences in demography. I separated from my wife 13 years ago, and joined the community 10 years ago. Almost all of the ~65 women I have slept with since have been in the 18-35 age range; only 2 already had children. And, tellingly, both of those women tried to get me back after LSNFTEs, despite the fact that neither of them were from my "high return" online group. Obviously we must be wary when dealing with the statistics of small numbers, but I think this may be significant.

        - You stay put in one place and so do most of the women you sleep with. Almost too obvious to mention, but if over 1-2 years your women were scattered to the four corners of the earth, your stats would not be nearly as high. One of my Russian ex-FBs went to South America and decided to stay. Another girl wanted to get back with me, but had to go home to Brazil. Another one still contacts me from inside a Balinese woman's prison. The race is currently on to find a mutually convenient weekend with an old flame before she goes to Kenya for a year. I've had offers to visit exes in places like Vienna and Vancouver, but it's a long way to go to get laid.

        I suspect we are both outliers in our own way, but my basic message is: highly consistent results probably rely as much on environment as they do on consistently following a tried and tested process.
        Last edited by Bluemoon; 08-26-2013, 12:14 PM. Reason: general clarification

        Comment


        • #5
          The 3% Latina figure is interesting. It mirrors my experience: What "The VICE Guide to Picking Up Chicks" said- "Only Latino guys can bang Latino girls", LOL.

          Comment


          • #6
            BD, regarding the high level of returning women, how many
            did you re-contact versus their re-contacting you? Also,
            when you initially disconnected, was it usually you ignoring
            them without really "formally" breaking it off? Tks,
            Groundhog

            Comment


            • #7
              My spreadsheet isn't as detailed as yours, but here are my stats (with a few guesses here and there):

              Ages
              Under 20: 14%
              20-24: 29%
              25-29: 28%
              30-34: 17%
              35 and over: 12%

              Regarding the under 20 year olds, my situation is the opposite of yours. All of the ones I banged were more than 4 years ago. I've moved since then and my circumstances have changed such that I don't meet super young women that often anymore (and I don't do online game). My newest MLTR is 23.

              Races
              White: 86%
              Hispanic: 6%
              Black or Milano: 6%
              Asian: 2%

              Hair
              Blonde (or dyed): 51%
              Brown: 17%
              Dark: 26%
              Red: 6%

              Kids
              29% of women had kids

              Never had a problem dating women with kids. The longest such relationship was about 9 months.

              Approaches Breakdown
              Introduced by friend 57%
              Day solo 17%
              Night solo 20%
              Online (facebook) solo 6%

              The solo approaches include both cold and warm (social proof, IOIs, etc.), but I don't really separate the two. Totally cold approaches are rare for me (but not zero).

              Relationships

              26% of lays were ONS

              Lengths of Relationships Excluding ONS:
              Average length: 6mo
              Longest: 4years 2months (including periods of nexting)
              Longest purely MLTR: 2 years

              3 months or less: 62%
              Up to 1 year: 23%
              1year or more: 15%

              Sex

              Percent who've done anal: about 15% (25% if you include fingers in ass) It's relatively recent that I've gotten really comfortable with going for Anal regularly, so this statistic will likely go up in the future.
              Percent who've participated in threesomes or group sex: 20

              Comment


              • #8
                I wish I had made a spreadsheet

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Blackdragon View Post
                  Average length of LSNFTE before return: 19 months

                  Longest LSNFTE: 3.5 years
                  Shortest LSFNTE: 2 weeks
                  it makes more sense to compute the median, instead of the average/mean, since a skewed distribution with outliers (e.g. chicks returning very quickly, or very late) will significantly distort the number you consider the "average"

                  http://www.diffen.com/difference/Mean_vs_Median

                  -M

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Just two guys is not enough to make a pattern
                    Last edited by Alejandro; 08-04-2018, 09:17 AM.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Answers to your questions:

                      Originally posted by DogSoldier View Post
                      Also agree that as an older guy, going after the young girls of 18-23 has a much higher probability of success than women my own age.
                      Yep, especially if the goal is getting to sex FAST within the minimum amount of bullshit.

                      Originally posted by Tank_ View Post
                      I was shocked to see so many girls with kids!! Seriously, huh?? I think I can count on one hand (maybe two) how many girls I've slept with that had kids. Naturally you have a higher % of 30+ women, but still at least 2/7 of 18-29 year olds you laid had kids.
                      Like Tub, I absolutely do not care if a woman has kids. I don't "screen" so I literally don't care.

                      And yes, many of the 18-23 women do have kids. Again, don't care.

                      Maybe that's part of the territory of doing so much online game?
                      Possibly. Not sure.

                      I'm curous: how many girls you sleep with you sleep with at least twice, and how many for at least 1 month?
                      My ONS stats are almost the same as Tub's. I don't believe in ONS but about 22% of women I fuck are ONS because they ONS me. Usually because they're cheating on someone and get guity after the fact. The other 78% get into a relationship with me that lasts years (in most cases) or months.

                      Originally posted by Bluemoon View Post
                      You highlight your LSNFTE return figures, which I always thought was a remarkable outlier. I don't disagree about the need for patience and outcome independence, but I think that there are a number of factors which come in play for you to make that statistic so high.

                      - You do online, rather than say night game. If I look at my rather small number of online lays, the LSNFTE return percentage is above 50%. For other women, I would guess it to be less that 20%.
                      Yeah, it makes sense to me that night game would yield a lower LSNFTE return rate. Yet another reason I never do night game.

                      Almost all of the ~65 women I have slept with since have been in the 18-35 age range; only 2 already had children. And, tellingly, both of those women tried to get me back after LSNFTEs, despite the fact that neither of them were from my "high return" online group. Obviously we must be wary when dealing with the statistics of small numbers, but I think this may be significant.
                      Wow. Very interesting.

                      You stay put in one place and so do most of the women you sleep with. Almost too obvious to mention, but if over 1-2 years your women were scattered to the four corners of the earth, your stats would not be nearly as high.
                      True, but I would never do that. My goal is many, long lasting relationships. So going after women all over the planet would make no sense to me. And I say that as a man who travels often.

                      Originally posted by Groundhog View Post
                      BD, regarding the high level of returning women, how many
                      did you re-contact versus their re-contacting you?
                      I don't track this, but my close guess would be 70% me contacting them, 30% they contacting me first.

                      Also,
                      when you initially disconnected, was it usually you ignoring
                      them without really "formally" breaking it off?
                      Exactly. As Dog already implied, I never, ever "break up" with a girl. Because a LSNFTE is not a breakup. It's a temporary break.

                      I just stop contacting her and go radio silent. No verbalization. (That's what boyfriends do.)

                      Originally posted by Tubarao View Post
                      Hair
                      Blonde (or dyed): 51%
                      Brown: 17%
                      Dark: 26%
                      Red: 6%
                      Ahhhh...someone also likes blondes.

                      Approaches Breakdown
                      Introduced by friend 57%
                      Day solo 17%
                      Night solo 20%
                      Online (facebook) solo 6%
                      Here's mine, although most people know this already:

                      Approaches Breakdown

                      Online Game: 86%
                      Introduced by other women I was fucking (what I've always called "Referral Game"): 10%
                      Social Circle / Work Circle: 4%

                      Originally posted by Manneken-Pis View Post
                      it makes more sense to compute the median, instead of the average/mean, since a skewed distribution with outliers (e.g. chicks returning very quickly, or very late) will significantly distort the number you consider the "average"
                      Good point. Median LSFNTE length before return drops the number from 19 months to 15 months.

                      Originally posted by Alejandro View Post
                      Just two guys is not enough to make a pattern, but I am surprised at the latina thing. Being latino myself I tought latina chicks were super easy if you are a white american guy.
                      Here's why, based on my (admittedly limited) experience with latinas:

                      1. Most latinas are attracted to younger, more gansta guys, not classy older white dudes.

                      2. Most latinas are super-high drama, and I don't do drama.

                      3. Most latinas WANT to get pregnant and HATE using birth control and WANT you to cum in them. They're insane when it comes to this. No thanks.

                      4. The vast majority of Central American latina women over the age of about 22, particularly Mexican women, are fat. They've got that big gut around their midsection. No thanks.

                      The few latina women I slept with were skinny, low-drama outliers. They were great (GREAT kissers!) but they were the exception to the above rules.
                      How to have 3 hour meet-to-lays and nonmonogamous relationships with any type of woman:
                      The Blackdragon Blog

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Interesting thread, because it relates to something I was thinking of posting about.

                        Typically, how many women would you typically each day? I mean approach as in speak to for the first time, with the intention of laying - I realise some would cold approach to lay in a matter of hours, others may take a while longer, day 2 etc.

                        Reason I ask - confession time - is my game is brutal, and I don't approach anything like enough. Probably looking for a bit of inspiration or something.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          My sample is I'm sure several times smaller than Tubs and Black (N=74), but here are my stats:

                          Where they came from:
                          Day: 16%
                          Night: 20%
                          Social cricle: 28%
                          Parties: 9%
                          Online: 23%
                          Strip club: 2 girls


                          Ages:
                          18-19: 14%
                          20-23: 46%
                          24-29: 26%
                          30-39: 10%
                          40+: 5%


                          Conversion:
                          ONS: 39%
                          Short term fuck buddy: 36%
                          Long term fuck buddy: 19%
                          mLTR 3 girls
                          OLTR 1 girl
                          LTR 1 girl

                          I was surprised how many LTFBs there are, those are my favorite.

                          I don't really care for mLTRs. Two of them were more scarcity based, I had to hang out with them in order to keep fucking them. The other was a good friend of mine before we started fucking so it was a natural transition.

                          See, I convert more that half of my girls to fuck more than once. (sometimes out of desperation, though).

                          I would prefer LTFBs entirely, like Blackdragon, but I tend to only be physically attracted to girls for 1-3 fucks, on average, in terms of the quality that I get. (see below)

                          Though I don't think I've ever LNTSE.


                          Some other stats:


                          Average hotness: (why I focus on day game)
                          Overall: 6.5
                          Day: 6.9
                          Night: 6
                          Social circle: 6.4
                          Party: 6.4
                          Online: 6.5
                          Strip club: 7.75

                          The difference between Day mean and 6.5 is statistically significant.

                          I was surprised Online mean is average, rather than low, actually. I had a couple 7.5s from it in 2011, that is why.


                          Average meet-to-lay time: 4 hours

                          Number of great sex partners (hotness+quality of sex >= 15): 6

                          Number of good sex partners (hotness+quality of sex >= 13.5): 21

                          Number of good new sex partners in 2013 (why I've been such a nuisance on this board lately): 0


                          I have specific ethnicity so no breakdown by race and hair

                          Out of curiosity, I counted Latinas, and I counted 9 Latinas, 10 if you count the Caribbean, which is 12/14%

                          Blackdragon,
                          I also do not care if they have kids, I just don't happen to meet them. That said, the majority of my lays are college students (and I hope to keep it that way), who tend not to get knocked early in life.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            what's LSNFTE?

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I forgot the acronym, but basically FB/MLTR finds monogamous relationship, leaves you, then comes back. From what I read, typically when she realizes how fun and exciting you were.

                              You guys are truly inspiring. I especially liked your last paragraph in the OP blackdragon; that is the approach I want to take eventually. Pick my woman with a clarity of though, truly clean from oneitis/social/family/other pressures and influence.

                              ... Right now, I just need to sleep with more women.

                              Comment

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