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100% Method for Meeting up with Girls

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  • 100% Method for Meeting up with Girls

    -

    Part 1 - Why Plans Result in Cold Feet.


    The inherent problem with planned events, is that during the period leading up to the event, there will be 'low' periods where future events are seen in a 'negative light' of worry or lack of enthusiasm. (Just think about a time when you were feeling worried, tired or just bored.) During such times, negative thoughts and worries tend to ACCUMULATE in regard to upcoming events. With longer time span, more such 'lows' will occur, potentially allowing multiple layers of negativity to accumulate. End result is often total loss of interest or even AVERSION.

    In short, planning in advance will make any previous doubts FESTER & AMPLIFY, resulting in COLD FEET.

    Conclusion: NEVER plan a first meet-up in advance.



    Part 2 - How to Make Unplanned Meet-ups Happen.

    Effortless way:
    -Avoid communicating entirely, until next friday/saturday night.
    -Then text something like "Hi Im at bar X! You?"

    Fast way:
    -Converse (text or phone-call) with girl WITHOUT hinting for a meet. Just flirt! No asking about what she doing or what her plans are.
    -The moment SHE HINTS for a meet, suggest meeting up 'right now'.
    -Example:

    ij: "Heeey tiger u awake? Friday was fuun " (typically 11pm'ish on a sunday)

    girl: "Yes? lol your name is sexyjiji?!?"

    ij: "What?? you typo on your cell?? My name is ijjjji. Nice to meet you!"

    girl: blablabla

    ij: blabla (insert playfully busting her balls!!)

    girl: flirty blabla. "Im watching series X. What u doing?"

    ij: X is nice? I could watch with you but starving.. U have food?



    (This method is much more effort, because sometimes you have to tease girls for days before they 'crack' like this. But it always happens sooner or later in my experience!)


    - -
    (Digression: The fallacy of reverse engineering is evident for this subject. 'Good' (popular) guys report that they never have problems when planning a meeting. (Since the girl had NO DOUBT to begin with.) Consequently, they tend to SPAM the forums with the BAD ADVICE of scheduling meets, leading to an endless stream of frustrated posts from newbies who always get last minute cancel from girls. On average there are 2 new topics like this every week. Every time the same useless advice given. Possibly making this the most deeply rooted misunderstanding in all of seduction.)

    (Scheduling meetups can actually be useful for weeding out lukewarm girls, in a situation where you have many girls lined up.. e.g. you could schedule 10 girls from online on the same day, and hope that 1 or 2 dont flake.. Be warned though: the reduction of interest still plays a role, so the girl could be lukewarm when you meet her, leaving you with more 'uphill struggle', compared to a spontaneous meeting..)

  • #2
    Finally, you made a post about this!

    You donīt need to explain this everyday to a new guy anymore

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by unknown View Post
      Finally, you made a post about this!

      You donīt need to explain this everyday to a new guy anymore
      And it's going into the Player Guide, so it'll be immortalized forever
      ~Tubarao
      fuzzyandoj.com
      www.crushingpavement.com

      Comment


      • #4
        Thanks ijjji. With method 1, do you just keep trying other days if no reply? For method 2 - I hate texting all the time but maybe there is no other way. I usually try to seed the day 2 in the initial meet convo and then schedule on the spot but still so many flakes (daygame).

        Comment


        • #5
          Thanks this is really helpful

          Comment


          • #6
            Great post, ij.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by ijjjji View Post
              -
              Part 2 - How to Make Unplanned Meet-ups Happen.


              Fast way:
              -Converse (text or phone-call) with girl WITHOUT hinting for a meet. Just flirt! No asking about what she doing or what her plans are.
              -The moment SHE HINTS for a meet, suggest meeting up 'right now'.
              -Example:

              ij: "Heeey tiger u awake? Friday was fuun " (typically 11pm'ish on a sunday)

              girl: "Yes? lol your name is sexyjiji?!?"

              ij: "What?? you typo on your cell?? My name is ijjjji. Nice to meet you!"

              girl: blablabla

              ij: blabla (insert playfully busting her balls!!)

              girl: flirty blabla. "Im watching series X. What u doing?"

              ij: X is nice? I could watch with you but starving.. U have food?



              (This method is much more effort, because sometimes you have to tease girls for days before they 'crack' like this. But it always happens sooner or later in my experience!)
              So much THIS.

              Additionally, you can increase your chance of baiting girls into showing interest by cultivating a couple habits:

              1. minimize negative talk or chitchat about boring daily routines

              NO: "yeah, gotta go into service center. i dropped my laptop and broke my screen. totally sucks!"
              YES: "i get to talk to computer nerds tomorrow. may need u to translate" or skip altogether.


              NO: "well i have to work until 8 tmrw, and then i have a band practice on wed. how's Thurs?"
              YES: "thurs works best for me. u?"



              2. talk positively about only activities or things that she is likely to be interested in, so you can congruently invite her along

              NO: "i have hockey practice and then the guys usually like to go for drinks..."
              NO: "huge fight last week at my regular dive bar..."

              YES: "going to go see my friend perform at this awesome open mic"
              YES: "cool new sake bar just opened. waitresses in kimonos and drunk businessmen. it's on."


              3. IME, mentioning specific food items, drinks and detailed activities works best for effective triggers, like advertising with pictures instead of just words

              NO: "bla bla going drinking"
              YES: "i'm in a tequila phase. i said it."


              NO: "bla bla eat food"
              YES: "the kind of place that makes the guacamole right in front of you. who knew there were so many ingredients in fucking guacamole?"

              NO: "live music bla bla"
              YES: "kickass U2 cover band whose drummer i may or may not have a guy crush on"



              As Ijjjji mentions, the key is to POUNCE the moment she expresses interest. This also means that you should not be baiting her with any activity that you would not invite her to. This can result in her expressing interest in, say, going disco bowling, but then being disappointed because the event only happens once a month. A false positive, creating negative rejection vibes.

              tl/dr: talk only about awesome things in some detail to bait her into wanting to tag along

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Daigoro View Post

                1. minimize negative talk or chitchat about boring daily routines

                NO: "well i have to work until 8 tmrw, and then i have a band practice on wed. how's Thurs?"
                YES: "thurs works best for me. u?"
                I like all the rest of your advice except this ^. I actually think the first part is better as it shows you're in a band! And work, that's what cool people do. The second one is cool in a nonchalant way, but doesn't show the cool stuff you do.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by SHB View Post
                  I like all the rest of your advice except this ^. I actually think the first part is better as it shows you're in a band! And work, that's what cool people do. The second one is cool in a nonchalant way, but doesn't show the cool stuff you do.
                  First rule of texting is the same as the first rule of writing. Show, don't tell. So don't mention it and then show up carrying a guitar bag. Much stronger.
                  We're here. The rest is bullshit.

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                  • #10
                    I've been waiting for this!

                    It's true, yesterday afternoon I texted my buddy if he wanted to go to a club, but by 10pm I was exhausted and didn't feel like going. Better to play it by ear sometimes.

                    So what do you consider a "hint" at meeting up, any question she asks you?

                    Could you post some more examples please! specifically of her hinting and you capitalizing on it.
                    The Qlue, simple perspectives on life.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Z View Post
                      First rule of texting is the same as the first rule of writing. Show, don't tell. So don't mention it and then show up carrying a guitar bag. Much stronger.
                      Aha! But this is under the presumption that she will meet you, if you don't tell, sometimes you then can't show!
                      But I think I agree now, it's much better to surprise her in person, like understated cool. Maybe all that talk about the band will make it seem like you're qualifying to her.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Awesome!!

                        This is right on par with the never-ending puzzle about "how to properly pursue a girl"...

                        Excellent stuff!
                        www.musicianlifestyle.com - Quit your job. Do cool shit instead!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          What's your success rate with texting 11pm'ish on a sunday? Won't she be asleep?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Whoa thanks for the nice feedback, everyone

                            - -
                            PaulB, seed a meet = DESPERATE..

                            With both tactics, you really dont care if she replies or not. Just try again another day. I remember one time:

                            Some dancing w/girl in nightclub, no kissing, exchange #, fast food together and split up.
                            ij "Hey im at X. U out?"
                            (week later Sat 1am - no reply)
                            ij "Anyone partying tonight?" (another week later Sat 1am - no reply)
                            girl "hi u awake?" (following Sunday around midnight - I rang her up and she said straight out she is looking for a 'cuddle' but not a BF, and I pop over.)

                            Morale is: Dont try to 2nd guess her interest level based on reply rate.

                            - -
                            Daigoro, you know I LOVE all your posts, so I'll tell you straight: some of your examples are HINTING FOR MEET.

                            Allow me to list the main topics to NOT bring up:
                            -future (any way shape or form)
                            -activities/interests/hobbies (esp. ones that could be done together)
                            -places
                            -food/drink
                            -what you are doing right now, or asking what she is doing

                            (I know, a bit excessive, but in order to make this method fool-proof (100%) even for inexperienced guys, it really needs to be.)

                            - -
                            Qlue, it neads to be a CLEAR HINT. Examples:
                            "Im doing X now/later!" (Where x is doable together.)
                            "What foods do you like?"
                            "Mmmm I have some delicious food X in my fridge."
                            "What are you doing later/day x?"

                            Warning - bottom one above is tricky! Planning must be avoided! I dodge like this:

                            girl: "jiji u so funny buuut what u plan after work tmrw?"

                            ij: "tmrw is uncertain for me I could call if becomes possible. but but waht u doing now? u have any good foods at home? im sorry im so starving!"


                            - -
                            j, if you contact her 5pm, that is a HUGE hint (beg) for meeting right there!! Please remember: NO (zero) HINTING FOR MEET. (Lol, I may need to compile an extensive list of various things that tells girls you are desperate to meet up with them...)

                            Sidenote - my reply rate is highest around 11pm to midnight. Girls too busy during daylight!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Ijjjji,

                              If you have success with this tactic, the better for you. But what I don't get is:

                              1. Why would she get cold feet when she likes you?

                              She would be excited instead to meet! Imo when she gets cold feet, she's just not so into you. I plan in advance, but not more than 2-3 days in advance, just because people in general don't perceive a meet in the long future as "fixed".

                              2. Why would you bring a girl when you're going out on Fri/Sat?

                              For many people, Fri/Sat is the prime night to meet new chicks, which seems much more difficult when you have a girl with you, also your logistics may not be optimal and she may get distracted by other people in the venue, etc. On top of that, girls are very busy those days, so you'll have to text her over and over again, and THAT is chasing. And also when you text her late on Fri/Sat night, it may seem that you're not having any success with other girls, hence you're texting her...

                              3. Why is sending a meet desperate?

                              It shows confidence, leadership, escalation, and that you know what you want, are not afraid, etc.
                              __

                              I don't have problems with meeting, maybe it's a country specific problem?

                              Imo, your protocol seems to me only relevant for girls you only met briefly and in the context of you going out in a large social group.

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