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  • Do martial arts

    Didnt see any threads on this subject - so here's my thoughts on the benefits of doing martial arts where you actually can get hurt

    I started doing kyokushin 2-3 years ago, inspired by Fight Club and Gunwitch ... i wanted to become more masculine and test myself.

    I figured it would be a better overall payoff then weight lifting and such. You dont get BUFF and BIG from martial arts really, but the other benefits outweigh the size thing IMO. And o boy has it paid off! I went from being a scrawny intellectial mid 30ies guy to a nicely built very confident looking guy. As well, you learn to handle and accept pain and just carry on.

    I did a beginner tournament last month. Rules: no grappling, no attacks below the waist, only kicks to the head, all attacks allowed on the body. We dont use gloves or headgear, so you have to get over massive nervosity and fear to get into the ring and get hammered - don't think I was ever so nervous as I was 1 minute before the fight started I had a great fight I lost - the other guy more experienced, so it was a very honorable defeat, broke a bone in my hand + one in my foot. And guess what? It was great and FUN FUN FUN! It just hurts a bit, nothing compared to emotional problems.

    I think there's an unconscious dominance hierarchy between guys, based on "who could beat up who". Like who switches their walking path on the sidewalk first if you are on a collision course. Who gets to enter the elevator first if you arrive at the same time. Small EC battles, There's plenty of other hierarchies, but this definitely exist and is rather important.

    I'm at the top of the hierarchy now. I do feel like a have a confidence edge towards other guys now - I'm just not afraid of them anymore at all. And those you DO know could deck you - ivulnerability doesnt exist - well, my attitude towards them attitude has changed to a sort of quiet respect instead of unconscious nervousness.

    My BL has improved vastly, both out of the confidence, but also out of the much improved motor controlls. I think martial arts beat dancing here ... even though dancing is awsome as well. The ideal would probly be to do both ... and then some yoga on the side lol ... but time etc.

    So I recommend all guys feeling weak on raw masculinity to do one of the "tough" martial arts as a hobby, don't think it matters which one - boxing, thai boxing, MMA, kyokushin, that sorta stuff. Do real tournaments as soon as you are ready. Risk getting hurt. And laugh about it afterwards.

  • #2
    If you can find a competent instructor I highly reccomend trying a softstyle Kung Fu such as Tai Chi. The combat sensitivity and techniques for leveraging your bodyweight that you can learn there are amazing. I can punch with power comparable to someone 2 or 3 weight classes above me. I would reccomend the art that I train in personally but good teachers are few and far between in it. I was very lucky to find my instructo as most practitioners are terrible in my style.

    The hierarchy you mention is interesting. I have noticed it in others, but I wouldn't pay much heed to it. You are developing a fighting sense, it will cultivate itself over time. You can probably start to gauge how hard someone can hit and how they might stand up to you in a kyoshin bout, which is a decent comparison to a real fight. If you expand your repetuar of martial arts you can start to notice a lot based on how people move, where their center of gravity is, and lots of other things that can offer insight into how that person would fight and how difficult or easy it would be to deal with them.

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    • #3
      I do BJJ and I love it. I totally agree with the overall point of this thread, even though you suggest martial arts where you can actually get hurt. BJJ is sort of less of a risk of that because there's no striking involved. Although there definitely is a chance that you can fuck yourself up or someone else.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Radiphant View Post
        If you can find a competent instructor I highly reccomend trying a softstyle Kung Fu such as Tai Chi. The combat sensitivity and techniques for leveraging your bodyweight that you can learn there are amazing. I can punch with power comparable to someone 2 or 3 weight classes above me. I would reccomend the art that I train in personally but good teachers are few and far between in it. I was very lucky to find my instructo as most practitioners are terrible in my style.

        The hierarchy you mention is interesting. I have noticed it in others, but I wouldn't pay much heed to it. You are developing a fighting sense, it will cultivate itself over time. You can probably start to gauge how hard someone can hit and how they might stand up to you in a kyoshin bout, which is a decent comparison to a real fight. If you expand your repetuar of martial arts you can start to notice a lot based on how people move, where their center of gravity is, and lots of other things that can offer insight into how that person would fight and how difficult or easy it would be to deal with them.
        I am thinking of trying out tai chi for exactly those reasons it seems to be wonderful for body awareness, it's more a question of fitting it in.

        just wondering, can you actually use your force when you connect? since i understand tai chi people dont really punch stuff, i reckon your hands and wrists are soft? im slacking a bit on strenght compared to technique, so now i can actually punch harder than my wrists can handle ... they start buzzing when i go full-force on a pillow for just 30 seconds. i need to fix that

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Newman301 View Post
          I do BJJ and I love it. I totally agree with the overall point of this thread, even though you suggest martial arts where you can actually get hurt. BJJ is sort of less of a risk of that because there's no striking involved. Although there definitely is a chance that you can fuck yourself up or someone else.
          i dont think it matters if its a kick/strike style or a grappling style, but what matters are the rules and the intensity of the competitions? the MMA grappling stuff looks pretty painful to me, and they use a lot of BJJ as far as i know.

          anyway, if one really wants to do a style that is less intense (say taekwondo), i think it's better to do that than to do a hard style you don't like...

          (on a side note, i always thought grappling stuff would be great for sexual dominance plays and escalating to sex. getting the convo onto the subject of BJJ, get her interested, show her a few moves, grapple her around, tickle, kiss and boom. punch/kick styles SUCKS for funny-friendly fighting and physical dominance. at least, if fucked up completlely when i tried )

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          • #6
            I agree, although I am generally a well mannered and non confrontational guy when I started boxing I gained confidence that only knowing how to defend yourself can provide. If an individual tries to put me down or threatens me I can now laugh as the thought of getting punched is no longer even a threat as opposed to something I do for fun 3-4 times a week.

            Although physicality altercations are stupid there is a certain confidence in knowing that you fear no one. This is confidence nothing other than a martial art can give you. You feel like you can say and do things you would otherwise not be comfortable doing. In addition, it makes you much more comfortable as a man.

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            • #7
              Oh believe me, I've used the "ya I'll show you some BJJ moves" trick many times as my excuse to be rolling around the floor with a chick that I haven't made a move on yet. It's a money escalation move!

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              • #8
                Kyokushin Karate is pretty much perfect for developing manliness. It hurts when you fuck up, so you tend to not fuck up the same way over and over. And THAT is how you get confident in your own skills. Kyokushin is also true Budo Karate, where the aspects of self-discipline, honour, respect and sincere humility is stressed constantly, something I haven't seen in most other full-contact 'sports'. There one-upmanship and competition seems much more in focus, things that take you away from developing yourself into a fuller, more well-rounded human being.

                I can't speak highly enough of Kyokushin Karate. It's something I'll keep doing until I keel over.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Stream View Post
                  I am thinking of trying out tai chi for exactly those reasons it seems to be wonderful for body awareness, it's more a question of fitting it in.

                  just wondering, can you actually use your force when you connect? since i understand tai chi people dont really punch stuff, i reckon your hands and wrists are soft? im slacking a bit on strenght compared to technique, so now i can actually punch harder than my wrists can handle ... they start buzzing when i go full-force on a pillow for just 30 seconds. i need to fix that
                  I wouldn't know about tai chi's punches as it is similar but not the style I practice, but I practice on an 80 lb bag and have knocked it off it's chains before being only 150lbs myself. Strength is better suited for sports and martial arts used in sporting competitions.

                  If punching hurts your wrist then there is something wrong with how you punch. If it hurts you might be landing in a position that causes your wrist to buckle. I'm not really sure how to tel what the problem is without seeing it, but the force should go straight your wrist and into your forearm, you shouldn't feel pressure in your wrist
                  Last edited by Radiphant; 06-03-2012, 06:35 AM.

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                  • #10
                    My kid, AKA The Teen Princess, studied Taekwondo for seven years. She achieved a Second Degree Black Belt, won State in Sparring twice, and was an instructor. She only quit when she got into high school and it was eating too much time and she decided to do running sports instead because it gave her a social circle in school. (She earned two Varsity Letters and was Captain of the long distance squad.)

                    It made her alpha and fearless. Stuff like standing up and giving a presentation in front of class does not bother her. Her words, "This is easy, no one is going to kick me in the head." It made her tough. Most girls put on a major act for minor injuries in gym. She just gets up and goes on playing. A lot of other kids, both sexes, say she is intimidating. All the big jock alpha males dig her, and all her former girlfriends from junior high hate her because she is so attractive and socially successful, but all her new friends are hot babes, star athletes, and high honors students.

                    It is the exact female mirror of the transformation guys hope for here. She was a super skinny nerdy tom boy who got all As, had a few weird friends, and got picked on a lot in the early grades, and we put her into TKD exactly to cure that. It worked and as far as I can tell, the only downside is her former best friends from grade/middle school all hate and shun her now; they are all 6s & 7s, several are already overweight and/or lesbian cat lovers, and she is a solid 9 who dates big jocks.

                    I believe the $20K we spent on it will help her success more than her upcoming college education and she would be a loser like her early school days friends without it.

                    The older the violin, the sweeter the music. Augustus McCrae

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