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Desperate To Solve My AA In Clubs (willing to pay)

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  • Jack Gignac
    replied
    I've never actually seen anyone have no AA in real life. And I've met many of the RSD coaches and seen them in field and a few other well known guys.

    Yes, there are times where I don't have it all but it fluctuates. The guys that claim they don't have AA when I actually see them in field and I can ask them to approach such and such set (if it looks difficult). They'll often come up with some rationalization to maintain ego frame.

    I'd love to be wrong though I'm just saying I haven't seen it before but yes there are times where I have zero AA.

    Usually it's a combo of social momentum, being in a good mood before, and sometimes being on a PED. The combo of those 3 is great. Also just eating healthy in general is a more mild and building up of PED. PED = performance enhancing drug. I could be projecting though because both of my parents are neurotics so I likely have the high anxiety gene as well. I think most people have anxiety moderate anxiety though as cities/clubs etc. are not natural. We're built to know the people around us for decades.

    Leave a comment:


  • Ratata
    replied
    I'd take COCPORN up on the offer! He really knows his stuff.

    Anyway, a lot of your AA is likely due to you making the approach something important, when it shouldn't be. It should be fun, but now it seems anxiety-driven because you lay a lot of responsibility on yourself to perform well to making sure that she likes you, when you in fact don't have much control over that at all. You can ease the anxiety off by also "approaching" men, and by being social with everyone. That's often enought to be viewed as a high value person by the crowd. Then you'll experience being bought beers and presented to the hottest women in the club without having to put much effort into it, bessides the initial mingling period. Visualisations and social affirmations also work surprisingly well.

    Leave a comment:


  • COCPORN
    replied
    I will coach you from the absolute and below nothing.

    I am not doing this from the benevolence of my heart. I am doing it to figure out that I am wrong, and in that case, I will take you down with me.

    Leave a comment:


  • Sase
    replied
    For me:
    1) alcohol doesn't help. (exception: when she is so guilt ridden and has a hard time giving herself permission to open up, alcohol provides a plausible excuse. Still I try to avoid it)
    2) being horny increases my motivation BUT ALSO my outcome dependency. Being attached to an outcome is the biggest factor in AA. When you realize you have a precious thing to offer, you'll start feeling used and then you'll wish you got back a bit of the AA tension. I still get AA sometimes. I think I relish it when I do.
    3) you say you get approached (by 6's, etc.) Instead of being busy staying above them, pay close attention to those interactions. You will be surprised how natural women can make it, talking to strangers. Knowing that women see approach as natural should ease your mind. Try to emulate, if not their exact words, their openness, vibe, etc. They tell you what they want to hear. Just get out of your head and learn to listen.
    OK, just read page 1 and 4, please ignore my advice if redundant.

    Leave a comment:


  • TheHustler
    commented on 's reply
    Have you tried doing smaller less scary things like smiling at girls and seeing if they smile back when you both make eye contact in passing for instance)? or ask for direcitons maybe (Maybe you need to take it slower but stay consitstent in your attempts at curing it. That is if the 30 day challenge is too tough for you.

    Maybe you could go to a clothing store and have a girl who works there help you pick out a outfit or somehting like that. Girls working in stores are a great way to cure it . too. Just talk to her while she picks out your clothes. It is there job to be freindly.
    Last edited by TheHustler; 05-18-2019, 05:09 PM.

  • madara
    replied
    I wanted to update you guys on my journey to hopefully solve AA.

    alcohol did not really help so i started trying to find ways to increase sex drive so i would be so horny that it beats AA.

    unfortunately, no one could provide a real way to significantly boost sex drive that is more consistent then nofap.

    I tried maca, avena sativa and stinging nettle root and none of them did anything.

    I'm back on nofap for now.

    Last sunday I also started a 30 day challenge where i will go out every day for 30 days in a row.

    I'm hoping this will also help with AA.

    I started last sunday so I've gone out 5 days in a row so far and I've done a total of 4 approaches in these 5 days.

    so I'm not off to a good start and I'm thinking when i go out tonight I will drink again but not sure.

    also, I'm thinking if after this 30 day challenge i still cannot approach then i will need to go take a bootcamp or something.

    if anyone has any suggestions, I'm open to feedback.

    Leave a comment:


  • madara
    replied
    Originally posted by SexualHero View Post

    Nobody said anything about being social, you beat AA by doing what you are afraid - approaching women. If you can't say opener you want, then you say something else you capable off untill your fear lessen so you can say whatever you want. Asking for a light is bottom of the barrel, thats if you are so afraid that you can't say anything else.
    I am not sure why are you not understanding this, nobody said anything about talking with friends what's that has to do with beating AA ? You beat AA by approaching women, there is no other way
    what do i do if i cannot make myself talk to women?

    Leave a comment:


  • SexualHero
    replied
    Originally posted by madara View Post

    if being social is the key then why do I still have AA when i go out with friends and I'm talking with them in the venue.

    this whole theory that you need to talk to anyone is nonsense.

    Talking to guys or staff (male or female) does not in any way help AA.

    I go to the same 3-4 clubs every week.

    I know all the staff and talk to them (male and female staff), that does not in any way help with AA.
    Nobody said anything about being social, you beat AA by doing what you are afraid - approaching women. If you can't say opener you want, then you say something else you capable off untill your fear lessen so you can say whatever you want. Asking for a light is bottom of the barrel, thats if you are so afraid that you can't say anything else.
    I am not sure why are you not understanding this, nobody said anything about talking with friends what's that has to do with beating AA ? You beat AA by approaching women, there is no other way

    Leave a comment:


  • Jack Gignac
    replied
    I still have approach anxiety. I've had times where it was almost 0 though but it never lasts. I usually need to warm up or be in a good mood.

    It's still a lot easier then when I first started though. I don't really believe guys who say they have no approach anxiety. It can only be managed or sometimes you have it sometimes you don't. It can definitely be improved though because I probably have some sort of anxiety disorder. Also had some pretty traumatic things happen in field that give me some form of PTSD (false allegations, police involvement, and guys wanting to kick my ass over an honest mistake of going for their girl and not knowing they were taken).

    I've done this too for more or less 10 years.

    Leave a comment:


  • Must
    commented on 's reply
    Yeah bro I’m not buying it. Should send me a pic in a PM

  • Must
    commented on 's reply
    You don’t talk to enough women you sit around on your ass afraid of peeping a word.

    I’ve been going out for six years, and I watch all the anime in the world and I also am the most insecure person on the planet.

    Go to popular venues, have a buddy *[aka spongebob and patrick] and make sure that when you are going through the steps of the game you are having the time of your life.

    Game after the first four years into the later stages for me is I choose a venue of preference where I can have free reign. I switch the venue yearly but have a different one chosen for three days of the seven day week.


    Tell me when your not on the Eight Gates. Personally I’m only on the third. Fourth is a cursed number.

  • Bexx
    replied
    Originally posted by Skills360 View Post
    madara you are in the aspie spectrum, is ok, many posters here alike, you are better off going ahead with the coaching...
    Nice diagnosis Dr. Skills

    Leave a comment:


  • madara
    replied
    Originally posted by SexualHero View Post
    Dude you are stuborn you ask for advice and then you don't do what you are told will work. Nobody suggested getting drunk, but you tried it anyways, no problem, always good to try new things. But you saw it doesn't work, so how about you do pretty much the only thing which does work in fixing AA ? And that is AA exercises
    You need momentum of talking with people, approaching people not just standing there alone and not socializing with anyone. Even if it's just a asking for a light it still helps build momentum. My motto is if I ever feel like AA is creeping back, I just talk to the first woman I see once I enter the venue. Just say ANYTHING it doesn't have to be valid game, I don't have to hook, all matter is just to start approaching. It basically sets the tone for the rest of the night
    if being social is the key then why do I still have AA when i go out with friends and I'm talking with them in the venue.

    this whole theory that you need to talk to anyone is nonsense.

    Talking to guys or staff (male or female) does not in any way help AA.

    I go to the same 3-4 clubs every week.

    I know all the staff and talk to them (male and female staff), that does not in any way help with AA.

    Leave a comment:


  • madara
    replied
    Originally posted by Must View Post
    Man I love showing up to the party. If this is a pity party havenít read anything but the OP.

    What can I or I guess in your style cantí say?

    Hey!

    Whoa!

    You know?

    I find when I go out people are helping me out, you know that one joke where chicks are piloting guys to their vaginas? Itís there for a reason.

    Ive been I think where you are at. And Iím not going to preach go to popular venues, and am not going to preach alcohol or drugs.

    All Iíll say is that no matter the venue I show up in I can both self entertain and also self appreciate. You know what that is like?

    If you donít I can explain.
    please explain

    Leave a comment:


  • SexualHero
    replied
    Dude you are stuborn you ask for advice and then you don't do what you are told will work. Nobody suggested getting drunk, but you tried it anyways, no problem, always good to try new things. But you saw it doesn't work, so how about you do pretty much the only thing which does work in fixing AA ? And that is AA exercises
    You need momentum of talking with people, approaching people not just standing there alone and not socializing with anyone. Even if it's just a asking for a light it still helps build momentum. My motto is if I ever feel like AA is creeping back, I just talk to the first woman I see once I enter the venue. Just say ANYTHING it doesn't have to be valid game, I don't have to hook, all matter is just to start approaching. It basically sets the tone for the rest of the night

    Leave a comment:

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