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  • Impression vs Expression

    I got that concept years ago watching the blueprint. What you think about it? I'm really tired of worrying about what to say and trying to communicate "perfectly".

  • #2
    Expression yay - impression nay.
    Since dawn of time, I argued that "impression obsession" is the true label on what we misleadingly refer to as AA.
    Also why Im against checking for IOI/AI.

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    • #3
      to me theyre just different sides of communication - each has its purpose.

      Example:
      Storytelling, improv style
      i know techniques that i know will capture people (impression driven)
      i will tell them from an overall structure (impression driven)
      i will clean my mind before i start the story fully aka no purpose (expression driven)
      i will follow my inner imaginations for how i tell the story (very expression oriented)
      i will use smart verbiage and powerful phrases along the way (impression oriented)

      so what matters in it?
      to me its where are your coming from - the "pressures" on your self you or others put up or dont put up (external/internal pressures - saleem made a super overview somewhere)
      for better expression with most people - one powerful source could be to instead to be curious, like genuinely
      for better impression - know how to ask questions and be curious eg actively asking into things she say while moving forward and leading her into it
      if either area becomes too "heavy" with bad emotions its worth looking into why that is -prob pressures youve put up and a lot of work
      but i would look for the source of how you enter each, not the specific terms. they are bot valuable in your comms imo.
      Last edited by glow; 07-28-2017, 11:26 AM.

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      • #4
        Glow you confuse me a little Isnt expression when something is 'sent out', and impression when something is 'received'?

        You seem to talk more like the entire communication process (sending + receiving) is leaning either towards expression or impression. If so, care to elaborate a bit how you interpret the words?
        -Hmm I guess express is less focused.. like I could express myself towards all the trees in the wood, even if I know they are not listening..
        -Or are you thinking more along the line of express being verbal and impress being vibe based (or read between lines)?

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        • #5
          For me,

          impression in the context of talking: talking to people carefully, to trying say the right things, to impress them. Believing that you need to talk in a specific way that it impresses the listener, say nothing before say something stupid

          Expression in the context of talking: talking what comes to your mind. believing that it doesnt matter what you say and what the listener thinks about it. focus is to say what comes to your mind.
          While trying to impress shuts me down, expression opens me up. At least since I started yesterday to focus on "saying whats on my mind" I talk much more.

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          • #6
            hehe i like how you can intelligently re-interpret things from several angles. awesome.

            As i perceived it the point of the statement beckstar mentions is to focus on
            expressing yourself vs impressing another.
            Life quote type that has flourished the net was "expression not impression".
            as such the real meaning of the terms is not it but an embedded meaning.

            Beckstar mention it as a way out of thinking about how to communicate perfectly aka with intent to "impress".

            Expression is done for you and by you without any sort of receiving end in it. So i figured thats what he was eluding to in the OP. eg for self amuzement.

            just how i perceived it. Is that more clear? And what says Beckstar ?

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            • #7
              Originally posted by glow View Post
              to me theyre just different sides of communication - each has its purpose.

              Example:
              Storytelling, improv style
              i know techniques that i know will capture people (impression driven)
              i will tell them from an overall structure (impression driven)
              i will clean my mind before i start the story fully aka no purpose (expression driven)
              i will follow my inner imaginations for how i tell the story (very expression oriented)
              i will use smart verbiage and powerful phrases along the way (impression oriented)

              so what matters in it?
              to me its where are your coming from - the "pressures" on your self you or others put up or dont put up (external/internal pressures - saleem made a super overview somewhere)
              for better expression with most people - one powerful source could be to instead to be curious, like genuinely
              for better impression - know how to ask questions and be curious eg actively asking into things she say while moving forward and leading her into it
              if either area becomes too "heavy" with bad emotions its worth looking into why that is -prob pressures youve put up and a lot of work
              but i would look for the source of how you enter each, not the specific terms. they are bot valuable in your comms imo.
              Interesting... from a writer perspective, something like copy writing is all impression driven while poetry is all expression in most cases (though you can ddo it by playing on impressions, like in riddles)

              There is always a blance of using preconcieved notions and expressing riginal thoughts in the beginning interaction with a girl
              Its actually quite tough to navigate because if you go 100% expressive the girl won't open up to you, she'll just ignore you
              If you go 100% impressions based she'll just enter into automatic reactions and assumptions and never open up to you.

              So generally I use SOME impressions, then lead into expressions
              And I repeat that process

              So for example, I set up very narrow constraints at first then abandon them
              So if a girl expects a certain thing in a club, I will give it to her, but then change the very nature of it before its too late

              Me: Hey lets head to the bar for a bit
              Girl: You wanna buy me a drink?
              (leads, not responding)
              Me: You know you have a nice way about you, but there is somethhing else about you
              Girl: What is it?
              (turn away from th bar or gtting the drink, look deep into her eyes)
              Me: Oh yeah, I know what it is, hahah
              Girl: What is it, tell me!
              Me: Well, (express something)
              Girl: Thats true!
              (turn back to the bar and order your drink and let her get hers)
              Me: Cheers!
              Her: Cheers


              The reason I won't initially respond is because it is actually smewhat important she initially thinks you are like any othhr guy but says yes based on how you lead her etc
              "okay, maybe hes an average guy, but maybe he'll surprise me"

              And then guess what, by expressing something, breaking up the routine, and socially leading the situation, I do surprise her and hnow she accepts me when I express things, rather than looking for impressions.

              You don't do this once, cuz girls will be looking at you from many angles so you repeat it...
              Its sort of not even a technique, just a way girls work
              They start with very PERSISTENT impressions
              If you are just expressive, they will get the impression you are not very socially gifted, or are a poet and be very off on about you
              If you are just impressive, they will assume you are stupid and that your charms at face value are all you have


              You change this up, by leading out with impressive thingss but then leading them into expressive things
              That way you break up an impression




              You start within narrow impressions, you end up broad and expressive

              Like a book... it MUST start with impressions, or else people wont know wtf you are talking about
              So you set up tropes and typical relationships between characters,
              THEN before the audience settles in, you FLIP IT and express things

              The audience then has just been served notice that they can and will be surprised and have their expectations upturned
              Which is ffar better than a story starting out different and boringly continuing


              Nah nah,
              You tease it,
              You slowly bring things towards impressions again, then, poof, flip it
              Over and over

              Until both trust and scepticism grow
              And you need both btw, scepticism so they do not decieve themselves into lofty expectations, and trust so they can react like themselves and enjoy things
              You start them sceptical by the way you set things up, then you end with trust

              Like a magic trick

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              • #8
                nice cozy - also to see your river thinking in practice.
                Not sure about the impression focus - especially in the initiation where you capture attention and sets up the premise (before the build up)
                i see loads of new dramature models that works diferently and way more impactfuld within movies and oral stories follow theirs better.
                im playing with introducing more nuanced characters within suspense types situations as a starting point kinda dropping people righh into a running story.
                But cool perspective and yes that very play between sceptisism and trust is a super dynamic of an enticing dramature.

                bekstar
                you like blurting
                which is definitely a much more alive place to be that in the 100% impression driven
                aliveness is great isnt it?

                that said - a few places to take it
                1) "Blurting" whats on your mind/your feels but doing so with attention to her/them vs. going 100% in the blurting direction. A technique could be swtitching between 1) giving i where you blurt something from your world and 2) asking in to hers/theirs/what someone is saying. this can basically be the only "tactic" needed for a day2. Just do that and see how it can transform a relation to someone into one of basic connectedness. adding little adjustments can make it more pleasant for her. small things like saying i just ask because im curious about it which melts her a little. and many others - but remember less is more.
                2) being grounded in you while asking questions - this is very powerful. kinda sense you own body from the inside and plant yourself there into the ground almost. then ask her your question from that state while staying in yourself.

                theres shitloads more - just a few to give some ideas.

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                • #9
                  Shure it feels great, glow I'm just a bit sceptical because I got it from rsdwiki. And I'm always a bit sceptical when reading something from them. Not because it's not good. Because it's too much. They have so much output people cannot process it in my opinion. not to talk about that tyler meanwhile is a cult leader in my eyes.

                  It's good that you mention the attention things. It's hard for me to describe this but i thought already about it and wondered. Sometimes the blurting gets changed when you change the focus of attention. with different people you cannot blurt it out as hard as with others.

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