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Seeing the matrix / secret society - a little too closely

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  • Seeing the matrix / secret society - a little too closely

    I went thru one of my new FBs phone (i know right...WHY!) but mostly out of curiosity not jealousy (I hope)

    I know she's seeing other dudes and 'working things out' with her ex, soo -

    1. I see her sms convos with other dudes like 'lets fuck this wknd' and similar - no big deal, but I didn't realize how many, like 6-7 at least
    2. I see her sms 'i love you soo much' convos w/ her ex
    3. I see her sms w/ her friend, about me - her friend (who i hooked up w) just seems wayyy jealous cause I kind of stopped fucking her - mostly it was a lot of conjecture about me catching feelings for her (my new FB)

    #1 - at first was like 'woah' but I'm over it already, nbd
    #2 - HONESTLY, I DO want girls to be saying that shit to ME. I'm not trying to wife anyone up tho. Is it just a dominance thing, an ego boost, or what?
    #3 - this kinda hurt cause I sent girl A this cute video of us, and girl A said she loved it multiple times - but her friend girl B was like 'wow way too much he's such a little teenage boy eww' (COMING FROM girl B, who texted me "baby" "love" "sweetheart" "you are BF material" like 1000 times after the first time I fucked her.) So is B just jealous Im fucking A over her? (and WHY? From her sms she's had like 4 dudes over in the last week, why trip on me?) i'm realllly starting to dislike girl B, she's got this masculine/power trip thing going on...shes like 10 yrs older than A.

    -Main reason it sucks, because doing cute shit is just part of my personality. If I HAVE to adjust, maybe do cute shit with a little push/pull? IDK.
    -I like cuddling, fucking & the sappy ass feelings that come with being close to a chick, is that so bad? Or a better question - how to enjoy it without them getting wrong idea?
    -Am I just overthinking all this & letting chick drama get in my head? (I'm leaning towards this...glancing over this post looks like a girl wrote it

    (and I'm never going thru a chicks phone again lol please dont remind me)

  • #2
    Very useful post imo.
    Anyone who has qualms about going for multiple FBs and saying nothing, should read this imo.

    Comment


    • #3
      Well, girls... once you know the truth, it isn't exactly COMFORTABLE
      Haha xD

      I just ignore it
      But am aware of it behind the scenes of what they say to me, and don't EXPECT purity behind any of their logic, lol
      I actually expect logical inconsistency

      It is like congruency... most guys are not CONGRUENT with women and who they are and what they are doing
      It is the same for girls, they don't always act congruent all the way through
      So you wind up having some different sides of them popping up

      With girls they are more critical of guys, talk about agendas, potential flaws, and sass the guy
      In their schedule they'll just act individually with each guy (and its just about what they want and feel personally ok about)
      And in front of you there is a degree of "only with you"


      Something cool about this though is when you can spot it
      Like... I will notice a girl reacts to me getting tense about something, and she later compliments me on it and pivots away from negatives
      BUT while most guys just are like "oh a compliment!"
      Im like "wait... thats cuz i was tense, she pivoted... means she mustve thought its best not to irritate me... hmm not good, i dont want her just placating me, buuut it partly makes sense, and maybe she just thinks it isnt necessary to crap on me atm"

      I dunno, girls manipulations dont DIRECTLY work on me
      So I actually react BETTER when I actually know the truth
      Liiiiiike, if I know the girl wants to reduce her amount of criticism level towards me, I can logically go
      OH OK, I can set that up for you and understand that you initially didn't mean to have xyz effect

      And to me that is cleaner and better than her painting a nice coat of paint over the older more critical coat of paint.


      I guess you could look at it like, painting over paint over paint over paint
      It becomes hard to be consistent or to appear clear on a point when all those layers are revealled
      BUT THE GIRL KNOWS WHAT SHE IS TRYING TO SAY
      So I look at it from the girls perspective of what shes trying to say, rather than comment on her getting jammed up by applying paint upon paint

      I then just say "x is what she wants to say"
      and I figure out the context of where it comes from (minus blame n such or shock)
      And I just take it for what its worth with healthy scepticism xD


      But I also react like that to girls in a club
      Like, I'll notice a girl is quick to want a kiss
      And I'll be like wait wait... you definately might hook up with ten other dudes tonight, LOL
      I thiiiink I'll chill
      And I back off

      Haha

      But yeah, I joke about this stuff with girls
      Like... a girl will say "set up two dates with girls this week"
      And I'll be like "you do realise those girls mightve set up four dates this week... but... fact is, I'm the best guy they set up this week so I'm the mvp of those guys, so maybe they hook up with one guy, but BOTH of those girls want me to be that one dude... lol, so two dates isnt the same... ha if I sucked, Id need to set up 8 dates to get one tho, lol"

      I guess what I'm saying is, don't freak out about it
      Just get up to speed and have a sense of humor, haha
      We are all just people, of couuuurse we do people things xD

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by youngjd View Post
        -Am I just overthinking all this & letting chick drama get in my head?
        You're not familiar wih _real_ secret societies, are you?

        Comment


        • #5
          First of all, I wouldn't tar all girls with the same brush. Girls love sex yes, and many are fully capable of dating several guys at once, while others can only date one at a time despite knowing that they are not in a relationship yet (unless skillfully seduced by a attractive guy, followed by feeling a bit guilty about it). I think dating many at the same time is the norm though, especially with younger girls as slutty behaviour seem to be getting more and more accepted in western society.

          -Main reason it sucks, because doing cute shit is just part of my personality. If I HAVE to adjust, maybe do cute shit with a little push/pull? IDK.
          -I like cuddling, fucking & the sappy ass feelings that come with being close to a chick, is that so bad? Or a better question - how to enjoy it without them getting wrong idea?
          Well, I do push/pull, or show an ability to quickly and effortlessly brush stuff off and shift focus, it makes you seem non-needy (not sure what girls say behind my back though).

          Another thing, people in general but especially girls seem to adjust their behaviour according to the people and the vibe around them. So if you are very sweet they will act sweet to you as well, even though they are usually not like that. This can be pretty interesting to observe at parties and such, if a guy enters the party and has a strong unique vibe, the girls who are into/submissive to him will start to adjust to his ways (sometimes becoming a completely different person), while those who are not into him will just remain as they were before.

          Comment


          • #6
            I don't know what you found shocking here- Her phone looks more or less just like mine...

            Originally posted by youngjd View Post
            I went thru one of my new FBs phone (i know right...WHY!) but mostly out of curiosity not jealousy (I hope)

            I know she's seeing other dudes and 'working things out' with her ex, soo -
            Jealousy is a strong drive. Let me guess... you are a mix of mad and disapointed yet super horny for that exact girl right now? There you see, jealousy is a strong passion!


            She can absolutly miss her BF and still fuck tons of dudes. This is because in a woman's mind, these 2 are not mutually exclusive... think of the lover vs the provider frame. Her ex is her best provider of emotional satisfaction and closeness, while the sum of casual dicks constitutes the "(sexual) lover realm". Some girls though, like to fuck tons of dudes when they are young.... either because:
            - She likes variation- usually a male thing, and pretty rare in a woman, unles she is a high testo woman (masculine chick)
            - Or because she likes all the validation she gets from men. Chances are she is not even fucking these guys (she may have done so, she may not, she maybe fucked them once and she may one day do it) but rather let them validate her through dirty messages (she may bait them into it, through dirty messages on her own). The latter is super common.
            - Or she is looking for THE BEST DICK, and fucking all these guys serves only as a mean to an end - i.e. a form of audition to find the most suitable guy. This is my current mating strategy and it has been inspired by women. This is usually done by smarter women with higher IQ. Remember women favor quanlity over quantity. They want validation from everyguy, and dick from only a few.

            1. I see her sms convos with other dudes like 'lets fuck this wknd' and similar - no big deal, but I didn't realize how many, like 6-7 at least
            Yeah well, usually girls tend to have 1-3 FB's - not 6-7. If she actually has 6-7 FB's you are either dealing with a very attention seeking women or a nutjob (not even the best most wack puas have 6-7 girls on a rotation) . If she was one of these confident sexual women, shed' let you know about this, directly or indirectly. She did not, it all came like a shock. You either failed at liberating her through your frames and the use of your dick, or she is whack. I honestly think she is playing you all.

            She s flirting with these guys, and she is doing so n order to get attention. Attention is her main motivation. That said she may actually end up fucking one of them at least. But most of them serve only for attention purposes. If she fucks 6-7 dudes a week, something is clearly off with her.

            Variation in sex partners is a male mating strategy not a female one.


            2. I see her sms 'i love you soo much' convos w/ her ex
            And this is probably true. She misses him, the memories, the sex and the time they spent together. Now... she is keeping all these guys around maybe because she is heartbroken? She keeps all these guys for attention in order to validate her. Validation is the cure to most female sorrows. Again this is attention seeking behaviour.

            3. I see her sms w/ her friend, about me - her friend (who i hooked up w) just seems wayyy jealous cause I kind of stopped fucking her - mostly it was a lot of conjecture about me catching feelings for her (my new FB)
            This is probably true too.


            #1 - at first was like 'woah' but I'm over it already,
            What exactly shocks you here?

            #2 - HONESTLY, I DO want girls to be saying that shit to ME. I'm not trying to wife anyone up tho. Is it just a dominance thing, an ego boost, or what?
            Framing, (sexual) rapport and pacing. These are the key words. Don't be just another fuck. Be her sexual soulmate. People still wonder why I do what I do. Here is one of the reasons. Open her up sexually, display non-judgemental frames. Open up sexually to her, and compliment and appreciate her when she opens back. Also what generally works is to frame yourself as 10 times "worse than her" - i.e. as a dirty guy with more sexual experience, with more liberated views, and with more kinky desires than her... this takes away a lot of a pressure from her. Why would she be scared to show her freaky sides with... a freak?

            #3 - this kinda hurt cause I sent girl A this cute video of us, and girl A said she loved it multiple times
            She probably did! It validated her. Problem is... when you validate women, you make them happy, but you get nothing in return. The only way that creates "fair transactions" is when you fuck her. Validate her with your dick and she will love you. Validate her any other ways and she will love it, but hate you.


            but her friend girl B was like 'wow way too much he's such a little teenage boy eww' (COMING FROM girl B, who texted me "baby" "love" "sweetheart" "you are BF material" like 1000 times after the first time I fucked her.)
            And there you go! She loved it, but lost respect for you. Women do not respect guys who sets the relationship frame on them. They like guys who fuck them. It is women's job to make a man commit, not the other way around. Women have little respect for men who tries to make her commit - by setting up a relationship-like frame.

            She sent the "baby" and "love" messages as a validation bait.

            Also you wondered how you could become a secret society man and get women to tell you their deepest secrets and desires.... well know this: a provider or relationship-like frame is "anti-secret society". The more you frame yourself as her soulmate or somebody who has the potential of being her boyfriend (or even just a guy she "dates" for a while) the less likely she will open up. You need to set a sexually open, no strings attached and dirty sexual frame if you want her to open up.

            So is B just jealous Im fucking A over her? (and WHY? From her sms she's had like 4 dudes over in the last week, why trip on me?) i'm realllly starting to dislike girl B, she's got this masculine/power trip thing going on...shes like 10 yrs older than A.
            Yes, but not because of the simply fact that you are fucking her friend. Sure this makes her a bit jealous, but what truly makes B jealouse, is that you are sending A cute videos and setting up a relationship-like frame with her. As they say, cheat on your girl, and she will give you shit for a day (and then love you more). Cheat on your girl, and take the number of the girl you cheated with in order to keep in touch with her with the intention to see her again, and your girl will go nuts.

            When it comes to guys, they go nuts if the girl fucks other dudes - the sex itself becomes the main driver here. Girl's don't. They only go nuts if there are emotions in the picture. Women seeks emotional exclusivity. They care little for sexual exclusity on a biological level (men usually do), although they do care about it on a social level, as having her date cheat on her, makes her look bad in public. But cheat on a girl without having anything emotional going on with the girl you cheat with, and make sure your cheating is discreet (so that none of her friends knows you are cheating)... and I swear that in most cases you will get away with it. The point i am trying to convey is that:
            - Women do not care much about their dude fucking other women, fact is it makes them more attracted.
            - But once there is an emotional thing going on, they go nuts - and not in a good way.
            - However, from a social frame, she doesn't want the pulic to know that her main dude is fucking other girls. Monogamy makes women look good publicly.'

            All the above applies only if there the right frames are set:
            - She sees you as a sexual guy
            - She knows you have other options
            - She knows you are the typical player guy

            If you are the nice guy type... she will hate you for just looking at other women.

            -Main reason it sucks, because doing cute shit is just part of my personality. If I HAVE to adjust, maybe do cute shit with a little push/pull? IDK.
            I do cute things with girls... But only after destroying their holes and set the right frames first. Make her open up, make her release her inner beast. Then after that you can allow yourself to be a bit cute with her. I usually only cuddle after we had the roughest sex on the planet. The cuteness needs to contrasted with dirtyness and sex - and there should always be a bit more "sex and dirtiness" than "cuteness". The sex part comes first. Make sure the right frames are set before even considering "cuteness".

            -I like cuddling, fucking & the sappy ass feelings that come with being close to a chick, is that so bad? Or a better question - how to enjoy it without them getting wrong idea?
            Follow my rule: no dirty sex, no strong orgasm ? no cuddling.


            -Am I just overthinking all this & letting chick drama get in my head? (I'm leaning towards this...glancing over this post looks like a girl wrote it

            (and I'm never going thru a chicks phone again lol please dont remind me)
            No you are not overthinking this. You just had a few wrong ideas and your analysis is a bit off. I have mentioned my interpretation of this. I am open to discuss these points with you or anybody interested.

            But...know this. Seeing the matrix can be frustrating and painful. It is all part of the process.

            -Teevster
            Last edited by Teevster; 05-10-2018, 07:37 PM.

            Comment


            • #7

              Originally posted by Teevster View Post

              - Or because she likes all the validation she gets from men. Chances are she is not even fucking these guys (she may have done so, she may not, she maybe fucked them once and she may one day do it) but rather let them validate her through dirty messages (she may bait them into it, through dirty messages on her own). The latter is super common.
              [/QUOTE}

              Probably this one.

              And this is probably true. She misses him, the memories, the sex and the time they spent together. Now... she is keeping all these guys around maybe because she is heartbroken? She keeps all these guys for attention in order to validate her. Validation is the cure to most female sorrows. Again this is attention seeking behaviour.
              Good point


              Framing, (sexual) rapport and pacing. These are the key words. Don't be just another fuck. Be her sexual soulmate. People still wonder why I do what I do. Here is one of the reasons. Open her up sexually, display non-judgemental frames. Open up sexually to her, and compliment and appreciate her when she opens back. Also what generally works is to frame yourself as 10 times "worse than her" - i.e. as a dirty guy with more sexual experience, with more liberated views, and with more kinky desires than her... this takes away a lot of a pressure from her. Why would she be scared to show her freaky sides with... a freak?
              Ironically, I did do this but then shifted my behavior to a relationshippy vibe. Definitely because I was jealous, not because she's fucking other dudes - but because I didn't feel like the #1 dude.

              But hold on - I know I was her first choice for sex - I just wasn't having her tell me "i love you" and shit like that. so maybe I just gotta get rid of my need for that validation.


              The only way that creates "fair transations" is when you fuck her. Validate her with your dick and she will love you. Validate her any other ways and she will love it, but hate you.

              It is women's job to make a man commit, not the other way around. Women have little respect for men who tries to make her commit - by setting up a relationship-like frame.
              Needed to hear this.


              You need to set a sexually open, no strings attached and dirty sexual frame if you want her to open up.
              I definitely started like this. I'm prob gonna have to next her for a week or two if I want to reset it?



              Follow my rule: No dirty sex? No strong orgasm? No cuddling.
              Burning this into my brain!

              Thanks Teev! I'm not worried about the sex part, I know its good and thats prob whats kept her hooked so far.

              However after we started hooking up, I started getting more reserved about talking about other girls / past sex / & stuff (but I'd show I was sexual thru my actions & state).

              She kept pressing me to 'open up more'...but idk I thought that was a good thing, considering the mystery/intrigue stuff that is talked about a lot.

              Anyway, assuming I will stop the cuddling & cute shit - how should I proceed?

              (To be completely honest I just want every chick I'm with to be totally dominated by me / obsessed with me. might need to talk to a therapist lol)

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Stargazer View Post
                First of all, I wouldn't tar all girls with the same brush. Girls love sex yes, and many are fully capable of dating several guys at once, while others can only date one at a time despite knowing that they are not in a relationship yet (unless skillfully seduced by a attractive guy, followed by feeling a bit guilty about it). I think dating many at the same time is the norm though, especially with younger girls as slutty behaviour seem to be getting more and more accepted in western society.
                Wasn't really trying to tar them - just making myself understand what they are FULLY capable of so I'm not surprised or hurt again.

                Another thing, people in general but especially girls seem to adjust their behaviour according to the people and the vibe around them. So if you are very sweet they will act sweet to you as well, even though they are usually not like that. This can be pretty interesting to observe at parties and such, if a guy enters the party and has a strong unique vibe, the girls who are into/submissive to him will start to adjust to his ways (sometimes becoming a completely different person), while those who are not into him will just remain as they were before.
                This is interesting now that I look back - during a couple days when I just stopped responding out of the blue (was w/ other girls) she missed me SHE sent ME some really cute/lovey texts & pics. It took a lottt of fucking the shit out of her and holding my frame for her to express that tiny bit.

                After she did, I think I let my guard down a little bit

                But I'm totally over any hurt feelings I had. Just a reminder that I gotta stay solid & unshakeable.

                (I'm thinking maybe I gotta spend less time with these chicks. Just cut it down to fucking them & leaving for awhile. Haven't really been following the 'rules' for FBs...more treating each one like a girlfriend for the day.)

                Comment


                • #9
                  hey guys one more thing:

                  she knows I looked at her phone and we haven't talked for a couple days, I figure I can

                  1. play it off and say yea I started to read a few things but got over it and didn' go further
                  2. be honest and say "I was curious, but nothing I saw bothered me, I thought it was interesting how blabla"
                  3. freezeout if she mentions it again?

                  Comment

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