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Recent high flake rate on Tinder

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  • Recent high flake rate on Tinder

    In my efforts to circumvent going out to the couple of bars and cold approaching, I have been pretty heavily reliant on Tinder. What ensues is that I go through the usual motions (mass right swipe, sort through the bots and less than attractive chicks, and try to proceed with the couple of cute ones who don't have wretched shit written in their bio that process leaves me with).

    I have a couple of matches in a municipality near me. One is in an isolated rural area, and the other is in a small city. I have some errands to run in the small city, so I figured what I'd do was go to the city, do the errands, meet up with one of the chicks, and then on the way back hit up the other one.

    My text correspondence was basically to let Chick1 know I was going to the city, and she responded positively. When I go there, I asked her if she was up for something, and after a huge delay, she tells me she's busy. (Womp-womp-womp.)

    So, onto Chick2. I asked her if she was busy, she says 'not really,' and I tell her I'm swinging by, and ask her if she wants to do something. Radio silence, and I haven't heard back from her since.

    Is there something I'm doing that is wrong? Is giving them notice like that a bad idea, because it gives them a chance to crack out the rationalization hamster or something?

  • #2
    Wrong for sure. Check guide post in hof for more info.

    Comment


    • Voyagerrrrr

      Voyagerrrrr

      commented
      Editing a comment
      Jesus, so I basically did the exact opposite of what I ought to have done.

  • #3
    This time of the year also you will get flake a lot more.... this is not a good season for online gaming....:

    Has anyone noticed girls becoming extremely scarce and exponentially flaky during the holiday season?

    Iíve seen almost zero online and offline activity for about a month; and it doesnít seem to be looking up.

    Online: No visitors to my profile.

    Iíve had three girls in the span of a week flake/cancel on a first date within the hour/within the same day, then not write back when I asked for a reschedule a few hours/a day later (when ordinarily theyíd write right back)

    The bars are dude fests!

    Does anybody else see this? (more to come later, in a hurry and will add more)
    Back during the warm summer months I was getting 3 Ė 5 matches every day. Now that its super cold and the holidays Ive been getting around 3 a week. Just wondering if anyone else has also been experiencing this? Iím guessing its normal.
    As Iíve said many times,

    If you live in North America, donít do any online game (and Tinder counts!) after about November 15th.

    Response rates plummet to near-zero during December and late November. During the holidays forget about online dating and focus on something else.

    On Jan 2nd response rates shoot back up again. Thatís when you should hit it hard (Go Time).

    This year with the weekend falling where it is, I would wait until Monday the 5th before resuming online game. But I promise you, next week response rates will be great, and will stay great until April/May.
    http://www.theskillsmethod.com/why-s...-the-holidays/

    Comment


  • #4
    Originally posted by Voyagerrrrr View Post
    In my efforts to circumvent going out to the couple of bars and cold approaching, I have been pretty heavily reliant on Tinder. What ensues is that I go through the usual motions (mass right swipe, sort through the bots and less than attractive chicks, and try to proceed with the couple of cute ones who don't have wretched shit written in their bio that process leaves me with).

    I have a couple of matches in a municipality near me. One is in an isolated rural area, and the other is in a small city. I have some errands to run in the small city, so I figured what I'd do was go to the city, do the errands, meet up with one of the chicks, and then on the way back hit up the other one.

    My text correspondence was basically to let Chick1 know I was going to the city, and she responded positively. When I go there, I asked her if she was up for something, and after a huge delay, she tells me she's busy. (Womp-womp-womp.)

    So, onto Chick2. I asked her if she was busy, she says 'not really,' and I tell her I'm swinging by, and ask her if she wants to do something. Radio silence, and I haven't heard back from her since.

    Is there something I'm doing that is wrong? Is giving them notice like that a bad idea, because it gives them a chance to crack out the rationalization hamster or something?
    The goal of online:
    - establish commonality and interest
    - see demonstration of compliance (with her following your lead)
    - get the meet ASAP

    In as little messages as possible.

    So, let's say you two chat via the dating app - tell her something along the lines of "let's grab drinks/coffee/etc, here's me xxx-xxx-xxxx"

    In an ideal world, she texts you. You then are handling logistics through text message on the when and where.

    In a not so ideal world, she doesn't text you but gives you her number. Already a red flag - statistically (meaning: my own personal anecdote), less chances of her being interested but still a possibility. In any case, wait a day or two and text her. Proceed with logistics. NEXT if it's not happening.

    In an alternate dimension, she doesn't say anything. Send a "Hey!" after one week, 5 days... NEXT very quickly if it falls flat. Some girls simply get busy and are interested. It could turn out that you still meet up with them. But, the point is, you have to be prepared for each nuanced outcome.

    Assuming your pics are good and the conversation between you two is running smoothly, it's likely a logistical thing. OR, next big possibility: these girls are not interested in you "asking" if she is up for something. In the scenario I outlined above, as soon as she is texting you it's as simple as "Hey! Let's do that coffee this week. What's your schedule like?"
    Her: "I'm free Monday at 5pm, busy Tuesday, free Wednesday at 1:03pm, blah blah"
    You: "Great! See you at X location on Monday at 5pm!"

    Going through the motions of arranging a meet through Tinder/any dating app does not really mean shit if she has not demonstrated some sort of reciprocal interest in you via her actions (such as texting you, checking out some YouTube clip you told her about, etc). Just because she is responding to you does not mean anything. It can be how she passes time when she is squeezing out a huge turd on the toilet - pretty cool visual, huh?

    So, in short, simplify the process. Give her some reason to comply with an action you give her. Lead her toward meeting. NEXT if she is not interested.

    Comment


    • #5
      These aren't even flakes since you never even setup a date/time/place with them. You went to their general area in an ambiguous timeframe, hoping they were available and willing to meet up whenever you were generally around.

      "Hoping" is not a plan.

      p.s. Don't ask girls if they're busy, who cares if they're busy. Ask them to meet.

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