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  • Men Allowed let's do an experiment

    I have this guy in my head, like, I know him and I am wondering whether it's actually a possibility to have him give in into his possibly feeling attraction towards me.

    Thing is, he is tooo focused and serious sometimes and he totally manages to make me feel like a follower which is horrible.
    Anyway this also means I am barely capable of flirting with him because it seems too forced
    + the last time it automatically happened.. I kind of told him to be blabla and be blabla or just be yourself and
    he kind of just looked at me without an expression, no words, nothing and I had to gloss it over with laughing and continuiing

    Does anybody have advice? I am not looking for a simple hookup, just something more sustainable. (not even sure whether a hookup would suffice.
    anyway a simple hook-up would fuck up my reputation if something happens without a OK background, so can't sexually escalate so need something more... interesting.

    Also not looking for the whole "become the center of attention" idea because that's not going to work this time.
    Arden Leigh is cool, but the guy knows me already. He has seen me being sexy not-sexy etc.

    Does anyone have any cool ideas?
    or routinelike things or whatever?

    Wanna give it a try

  • #2
    Ok... Since we are experimenting... I have a way of looking a men's seduction styles below. If you know the guy well enough to have seen him interact with other women as well as you, then you may be able to figure out his romantic style and then reverse engineer your approach to push his buttons... This is hardly thoroughly field tested but I have shown this to a few single woman that I have platonic or avuncular friendships with and in 2 out of 3 tries it was helpful. It got my accountant who is a cool chick but not even a little pretty a very decent boyfriend... and they are surfing a nice wave on NRE right now.

    So lets start with two questions... What do you think HB Serious' seductions style is, and if you asked him which one would he say he is... They can be different.

    Here are the 4 variables, it seems to me that everybody has 2, one dominant and one recessive. (eg. I am a P/r, I think Kant is a S/n, Black Dragon is a hard core S/r etc…) I think they can go together in different permutations that color your sexual appetite:


    (P) Process of Seduction Men-
    I am like this. I love the process of seduction. I love it so much so that I will half seduce a woman I have no intention of sleeping with just for the pleasure of the interaction. There are times when for somebody with this kind of extroverted personality, that just flirting and feeling the spark of attraction is sufficient. (P) men like elaborate seductions that take time. (P) men don't like internet dating... too technical and it does not scratch the Lothario itch... They love day game and or dance floor game. I think true (P) men are also satisfied by seducing an existing lover into testing their sexual limits, or trying something new. It’s the interaction, the power exchange, and the chance of failure that are thrilling to these kind of men.
    (S) Straight to the Sex Men-
    I think Black Dragon and Kant are like this. They want to get to the sex it in a hurry, because to them the sex is more pleasurable then the set up... The interaction is physical first and only secondarily emotional. (Or could it be the emotional pay off for you is somehow connected to the physical. I am getting into some serious KJ here because I am not built like this.) What I do know is guys like this love the internet... tinder and OKC etc… Why waste time messing around with random women in bars and coffee shops getting personally shot down. They say things like not using the internet is “inefficient.” Their filed reports have allot less contextual detail but allot more explicit sex.


    (N) New Conquest Men-
    New Conquest men are aroused by the thrill of the new woman. Re-seduction that is the pleasure of getting an existing lover to do something new or adventurous is not going to do as much for them. (N) Men have a very hard time with LTRs and if they agree to monogamy tend to cheat. Sexual variety may well be more important to them then the sex itself. The question to ask yourself to see if you are an (N) guy is would you rather have mediocre sex with beautiful new woman… or would your rather have extraordinary sex with a cute but not beautiful MLTR. If the answer is the former then you are seriously an (N) guy.




    (R) Relationship Security Men-
    Prefer to have a stable woman, or stable of women in their life. This can be anything from a traditional mid-20th century marriage to a list of booty call girls. The point is not the structure of the relationships it’s the ease of having a go to gal when you want one. (R/s) men are your standard sloppy chump husband who thinks,” Happy wife = Happy life…” will ensure him regular and exclusive vagina access. (R/p) men are the perfect provider husband type with the flowers and thoughtful notes etc… (R/p) is what many women think they want, until they have it and get bored… In my experience (R/p) get cheated on allot.


    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    So here are the relationship styles and haw I see them working, please feel free to add to my thinking, or tell me I am full of it if you think so:


    (P/n) Serial seducers who have elaborate but not very long affairs… Think 9-1/2Weeks. They have an adventure hang out for a little while and move on. Women often remember the flings fondly.


    (P/r) Have OLTRs or Wives with whom they have elaborate domestic relationships, but have other seductions going on discreetly on the side, usually with the main woman’s knowledge and even acceptance. The French Marriage as opposed to the Mediterranean Marriage.


    (S/n) If these guys are in an OLTR they gravitate towards threesomes and also the swing lifestyle… Basically sharing there (N) with a partner.


    (S/r) Lots of MLTRs and FBs… The guy that always some booty on speed dial. They love women but never let one move into their house. Harem mangers extraordinaire.


    (N/p) The kind of guy women really hate… All about head games. They a have a bunch of elaborate seductions going on at once. The management is crazy and they often weave very tangled webs. Lots of drama, which they get off on.


    (N/s) The true player… Love-em and leave-em.


    (R/s) Sloppy unromantic AFC. Think Ray Romano


    (R/p) The romantic provider husband who can’t understand why all of the flowers and dinners etc… are continuously eroding his sexiness.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by The Thin Man View Post
      Ok... Since we are experimenting... I have a way of looking a men's seduction styles below. If you know the guy well enough to have seen him interact with other women as well as you, then you may be able to figure out his romantic style and then reverse engineer your approach to push his buttons... This is hardly thoroughly field tested but I have shown this to a few single woman that I have platonic or avuncular friendships with and in 2 out of 3 tries it was helpful. It got my accountant who is a cool chick but not even a little pretty a very decent boyfriend... and they are surfing a nice wave on NRE right now.

      So lets start with two questions... What do you think HB Serious' seductions style is, and if you asked him which one would he say he is... They can be different.
      To be honest: I have no clue!! I have never seen him making out with someone, nor really being overtly flirty. Just flirty in the way that also could be explained as "touchy" and verrrrry close to people. So like cuddling up in a sofa with another guy, hugging a lot. He is ok with a little bit flirting, but I know the girls he flirted with already had a girlfriend or either were just really nice..

      Actually someone who i told the stories to told me i just had to be more upfront and show him interest and that he may have been waiting for interest and then decided to move on.

      If I had to guess his style ad random?
      I would go for either P/r or R/p.

      Why? Because he seems more into honesty than deceitfulness (he was all pro honesty as far as I know) and he seems to like long-lasting relationships with friends

      edit: apparently my post didn't get through. + I forgot the [men-allowed] tag again

      Comment


      • #4
        It sounds to me like this guy is a bit uncomfortable with women, and is unsure how to proceed if a woman shows interest and may be unsure if you are opening the door a crack. You might try a lame excuse for isolation, see what happens. He may not make a move there either. Some guys can be super competent at life but very awkward with women.
        The older the violin, the sweeter the music. Augustus McCrae

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Silvertree View Post
          It sounds to me like this guy is a bit uncomfortable with women,
          I don't know, i mean, he seems confident and all with almost everything. Also he gave massages, just like it was nothing.
          To me that's not really like "uncomfortable"... but maybe he is uncomfortable with trying more?
          and is unsure how to proceed if a woman shows interest and may be unsure if you are opening the door a crack.
          I am afraid of showing interest, so perhaps it's my mistake as well.. on the other hand. That not responding was definitely strange and maybe could be put there...
          My wondering was basically: is it the opening the door a crack, or was his silence about the whole "you can also just be yourself" thing?
          Did it hit a nerve/an insecurity, or did it go to far with prying ? or am I looking for too much behind this?

          You might try a lame excuse for isolation, see what happens. He may not make a move there either. Some guys can be super competent at life but very awkward with women.
          Hmm, the last few times he proposed something more private ( I thought) but it turned out not to be more private at all..

          Anyway guess it's just stupid hormones that made me make this topic. Haven't seen him for 2 weeks now and the idea of him has partly started fading away already
          Guess there will be some kind of update tuesday lol.
          I wonder whether he is doing it on purpose. Flirting with most girls, just to make sure they like him. He is supposed to (or may like to) get everyone to like him anyway.

          (And don't start about oneitis, because i definitely feel it not being there, at least not yet or definitely not right now)

          Any other random ideas to try?

          Comment


          • #6
            You have to consider that he may be good at lots of things but somehow not see himself as attractive to women and sexually clueless/insecure. Massages sound like a lame attempt to get something going, but then being too unsure to move towards sexual.
            The older the violin, the sweeter the music. Augustus McCrae

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Silvertree View Post
              You have to consider that he may be good at lots of things but somehow not see himself as attractive to women and sexually clueless/insecure.
              Hmm i can't possibly imagine him not seeing himself as attractive to women.
              I would believe he could feel sexually clueless/insecure.
              He seems to have a focus on a lot, except on everything that you could consider a waste of time.. partying etc.

              Massages sound like a lame attempt to get something going, but then being too unsure to move towards sexual
              That's what i thought.. like "playing with the idea" but not actually going there. That's the idea i get with both of us. I need a way to move it from playing with the idea to "it's a real option" to "let's date" or something similar. Can't move it sexual.. not yet while we have to keep seeing each other lol

              I hate the fact that I can't just directly show him interest, on the other hand it's fun to have something to try.. to create a situation out of it that leaves him with an excellent option to try..

              Just thought you guys could help find a cool idea

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Kit View Post
                To be honest: I have no clue!! I have never seen him making out with someone, nor really being overtly flirty. Just flirty in the way that also could be explained as "touchy" and verrrrry close to people. So like cuddling up in a sofa with another guy, hugging a lot. He is ok with a little bit flirting, but I know the girls he flirted with already had a girlfriend or either were just really nice..

                Actually someone who i told the stories to told me i just had to be more upfront and show him interest and that he may have been waiting for interest and then decided to move on.

                If I had to guess his style ad random?
                I would go for either P/r or R/p.

                Why? Because he seems more into honesty than deceitfulness (he was all pro honesty as far as I know) and he seems to like long-lasting relationships with friends

                edit: apparently my post didn't get through. + I forgot the [men-allowed] tag again
                I was reading R/p between the lines but I did not want to over-trust my intuition... Not asking, and just shooting from the hip, is the vice of an intuitive person.

                Here is the thing R/p guys are easy pickings... They will treat you well but are oppressed by traditional ideas about chivalry that they were raised with... So you mix an over developed sense of honor with the natural fear of approach that all men have to deal with at some point, and this guy is a ball of trapped sexual energy... Lighting in a bottle.

                He will get a massive crush on the first woman that is slick enough to pick the lock on his chastity belt. Here is the hard part he will not seduce you... End of story. You must seduce him... Hints and eyelash fluttering will not do it. The trick is to go direct without putting him on the spot... Do what we do, create a sexual situation where he is first maneuvered out of a social situation into isolation, then give him the green light. If, as I expect he is, too young and well the P/r way he is, to do anything about the green light, you will need to gently take it up a notch.

                This is hard... Too overt will not work. When I was your age and still had an R/p world view I had a woman that was into me (I was a little on the fence) invite me to her dorm room on some long lost to the mists of time pretext, and when I got there she was wearing full lingerie... I mean garters stockings, and panties and a bra, and some flimsy excuse for a robe... And nothing ease... It was sex on a platter, and I passed. Silly me... But anyway it was way too much for my AFC mind of that time to take in at once... Sadly. I have a regretful (years later) gut feeling that the sex would have been earth shattering. But learn from this long ago chick, it is still a seduction even if your are a woman, small steps that lead to a sexual situation not just SURPRISE... TODAY"S SPECIAL IS PUSSY!

                So my advice is isolate to a great location, if you are not comfortable with the bounce keep going until your are. Guys don't fear isolation and will not resist it at all... At that point flatter a touch, and then kiss the guy... If he does not take over, and do you like the woman that you are once your break the glass, move on, there are plenty of guys who will.

                Oh yea public service announcement... Uncle Thin Man says," Always make him wear a condom (have some on hand)... No Baggie no Pussy..."

                Also final warning R/p guys are a some time thing...It will be great, and then nice, and then OK, and then you will move on... Let the poor thing learn, dont just break him in half.

                Comment


                • #9
                  thnx for your response.. i have no clue how to lead him slowly to a sexual situation? perhaps i am doing something ridiculously wrong..

                  I saw him today. Gave him a smile from far away. couldn't even help myself, had to do it. he first was scanning around and then he saw me, locked eyes started smiling at first and then winked back at me.

                  It's so superhard for me not to read more into it.


                  Also final warning R/p guys are a some time thing...It will be great, and then nice, and then OK, and then you will move on... Let the poor thing learn, dont just break him in half.
                  I am not even thinking that far away.. possibly because I have no clue how it will be with him.
                  It's just this idea I have.. this idea that it may become inevitable at some point to remove my thoughts from him, so may as well give it a try..

                  Comment

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