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  • Men Allowed So help me with this new guy!!

    Okay, I met a new guy that I'm really liking!! Only, for like the first time in my life I have to admit he might be out of my league. Except, he seems to really like me and it just seems too good to be true!!

    He's my age. He's hot, he's very wealthy and very smart, a former college football player for a big name school and incredibly good in bed... probably the best sex of my life. He waited 4 dates to have sex with me and I am kind of baffled about that. He ended the first three dates with a nice...hug.

    At first I thought he must be married, but I actually think he might be telling the truth about being single. He says women always think he is married or sleeping around with tons of women because he travels so much but that really he spends most of his time working. He's so bluntly honest about things that it is hard to picture him living a secret double life.

    Anyway, we met on Tinder several months ago. We had a great first date but then Tinder stopped working on my phone and we hadn't exchanged numbers, so when he emailed I wasn't able to respond. When it started working again I replied and he was happy to hear from me and took me out again. I've since seen that he also tried to hit me up on OKCupid during that time. He was like "hey stranger, I've been looking for you!!!" So I guess I was kind of unwittingly playing hard to get, lol.

    Anyhow I just found the OKCupid message yesterday and got a kick out of checking his profile and seeing how he responded to some of the questions on there vs how I did. We were like an 85% match. I can see he is okay with open relationships so I do like that. He is an ESTJ according to one of the tests on there (I am an ENFP) so very different personalities but agree on a good portion of things. Others, we are like night and day, haha. I told him I was amused by it and he just laughed.

    I don't know what he wants from me, as far as relationship/just sex/etc. I don't want to assume anything but I don't want to fuck it up by assuming he DOESN'T want more if he does either. It's early enough on that it wouldn't be the end of the world to me no matter what the outcome is, but I would like to try and see what happens with this one.

    So, any tips? How can I get things off to a good start? I mean they are already off to a good start, he will text me when he is on his business trips just to say hi and he calls me beautiful, etc. He doesn't do it every day, but at least every couple of days and when he came home this last time the first thing he wanted to see was me, he planned it like a week ahead. So I know he likes me, I'm just kind of like, shocked that its as much as it seems to be so far. He just seems too perfect, its unreal. I know I'm bowled over by the good sex though too, ha!

  • #2
    No one has any advice? Lol

    Comment


    • #3
      lol

      ESTJ according to one of the tests on there (I am an ENFP)
      hahaha this is funny in a way. Was just looking into MBTI the past months.
      Anyway let me see: the functions are so similar but the preference of using so different that it seems like a good match to me

      hmmm most people who have feeling later in their stack still love people who feel, they just may get annoyed at making decisions based at feelings.
      anyway there is no scientific proof for MBTI except that most people like to work with it right?
      ( you had a degree in psychology right? Perhaps you even know better?)

      But just go out, date some, see how it goes? just let it flow. No tactics or anything. that's what i would do. Also with your personalities and stuff.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Kit View Post
        lol



        hahaha this is funny in a way. Was just looking into MBTI the past months.
        Anyway let me see: the functions are so similar but the preference of using so different that it seems like a good match to me

        hmmm most people who have feeling later in their stack still love people who feel, they just may get annoyed at making decisions based at feelings.
        anyway there is no scientific proof for MBTI except that most people like to work with it right?
        ( you had a degree in psychology right? Perhaps you even know better?)

        But just go out, date some, see how it goes? just let it flow. No tactics or anything. that's what i would do. Also with your personalities and stuff.
        Yeah, so far its go with the flow, but I'd like to up my chances with him.

        Comment


        • #5
          here we go again, and congratulation on a website on trying to game dudes just lol, i will repeat this for 100th time, what women need:

          1.- Look good

          2.- have a vagina

          3.- be good in bed

          4.- do not be to clingy, psycho, drama.

          5.- other aspect (kids, divorce, family, financial situation) play a big part.

          After that the dude will choose if he wants to keep seeing you or not, even if he has a wife, gf, he will dump her if he likes you enough.... WOMEN DO NOT NEED GAME.

          If this dude wants you, you will know, there is 0 you can do, is out of your control... (for the 100th time)... IT IS ALL ABOUT SMV.

          In before the same post in couple of months...

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Skills360 View Post
            here we go again, and congratulation on a website on trying to game dudes just lol, i will repeat this for 100th time, what women need:

            1.- Look good

            2.- have a vagina

            3.- be good in bed

            4.- do not be to clingy, psycho, drama.

            5.- other aspect (kids, divorce, family, financial situation) play a big part.

            After that the dude will choose if he wants to keep seeing you or not, even if he has a wife, gf, he will dump her if he likes you enough.... WOMEN DO NOT NEED GAME.

            If this dude wants you, you will know, there is 0 you can do, is out of your control... (for the 100th time)... IT IS ALL ABOUT SMV.

            In before the same post in couple of months...

            Okay, you even said yourself
            After that the dude will choose if he wants to keep seeing you or not, even if he has a wife, gf, he will dump her if he likes you enough....
            What, specifically, would make a man "like you enough" for all of that?

            Comment


            • #7
              congratulation on a website on trying to game dudes just lol,
              Yeah, well, I probably won't be on there long. People are already bitching about me and I've been asked to modify my comments, which I will not agree to do.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Skills360 View Post
                here we go again, and congratulation on a website on trying to game dudes just lol, i will repeat this for 100th time, what women need:

                1.- Look good

                2.- have a vagina

                3.- be good in bed

                4.- do not be to clingy, psycho, drama.

                5.- other aspect (kids, divorce, family, financial situation) play a big part.

                After that the dude will choose if he wants to keep seeing you or not, even if he has a wife, gf, he will dump her if he likes you enough.... WOMEN DO NOT NEED GAME.

                If this dude wants you, you will know, there is 0 you can do, is out of your control... (for the 100th time)... IT IS ALL ABOUT SMV.

                In before the same post in couple of months...
                Look, skills, I like you but, seriously. Imagine someone telling you all a guy has to do is the following:

                1.- Look good and have money

                2.- have muscles

                3.- do not be too clingy, psycho, weird, or an outsider.

                4.- be good in bed

                5.- other aspect (relationship, kids, divorce, family, job situation) play a big part.

                What would you say?

                Also to add something: the guy I went to bed with last night?
                1) check
                2) check
                3) check
                4) check
                5) check

                => do i want a relationship with him? dont know yet.

                It's the same for guys. Even if you have all of that, that does NOT mean someone wants a longer lasting relationship with you.

                She's not asking for the minimum requirements to be seen as a women..

                she is asking what she can do to improve her chances to be noticed as real dating material.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Kit View Post
                  Look, skills, I like you but, seriously. Imagine someone telling you all a guy has to do is the following:

                  1.- Look good and have money

                  2.- have muscles

                  3.- do not be too clingy, psycho, weird, or an outsider.

                  4.- be good in bed

                  5.- other aspect (relationship, kids, divorce, family, job situation) play a big part.

                  What would you say?

                  Also to add something: the guy I went to bed with last night?
                  1) check
                  2) check
                  3) check
                  4) check
                  5) check

                  => do i want a relationship with him? dont know yet.

                  It's the same for guys. Even if you have all of that, that doesn't mean someone wants a longer lasting relationship with you.
                  I would say, he is full of shit, but the key word is GUY

                  Women = buyers

                  Guys = sellers...

                  Do you see the difference.. There is not change in behavior or actions, she can play the perfect so call game, and it will not make a difference (by the way, I have proven this point to lg many times, with many guys)

                  p.s. lg knows more game than 90% of the forum and girls i know irl... She knows what the problem is, which i am not going to bring up again.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Skills360 View Post
                    here we go again, and congratulation on a website on trying to game dudes just lol, i will repeat this for 100th time, what women need:

                    1.- Look good

                    2.- have a vagina

                    3.- be good in bed

                    4.- do not be to clingy, psycho, drama.

                    5.- other aspect (kids, divorce, family, financial situation) play a big part.

                    After that the dude will choose if he wants to keep seeing you or not, even if he has a wife, gf, he will dump her if he likes you enough.... WOMEN DO NOT NEED GAME.

                    If this dude wants you, you will know, there is 0 you can do, is out of your control... (for the 100th time)... IT IS ALL ABOUT SMV.

                    In before the same post in couple of months...
                    LMFAO! but since she asked...

                    6. With make up, less is more

                    7. Wear a dress tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to show you're a lady

                    8. Master the art of strip tease

                    9. See number 8

                    10. Make him feel like your hero [previously discussed]

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Women = buyers
                      Guys = sellers...


                      Isn't what you are suggesting also possible the other way around?

                      The sellers make themselves pretty, make themselves look like 10s for the guys, catch their eyes, even dress up slutty and want them to pay "the highest price" possible
                      The buyers try to find a personal 10 for the amount of money they have.

                      Then the way you are suggesting:
                      The sellers stall all their attributes and try to catch the eyes of the buyers
                      The buyers look around for the guy which has the attributes they demand.

                      Personally I think this is a weird not that fruitful way of looking at male/female dynamics... I think it goes both ways. The trick is to find a match that's suited well for both sides, including mutual understanding, trust, authencity etc. There is a reason why research shows that most people are most satisfied in relationships where the partners are equally attractive.

                      Also: not all guys look for prettyness the personal 10. not all girls look at money for their personal 10.
                      This is stereotyping to the extreme. Women who are using shorttermmatingstrategies look for looks, guys looking for the future mother of their children look for someone reliable, mentally stable etc, who is a bit like their mom. And prefer to be financially stable before actually getting to children.
                      Poor guys(guys who had not have enough food) tend to prefer woman with bigger cups => which indicates more food => more money.

                      So it's ridiculous to say that that's the way the world works, because it doesn't in my eyes.
                      Yeah it's pretty easy to pretend it works like that and pick up guys with that mindset, BUT to actually be satisfied, you just simply need more than a buyers mentality.


                      I would say, he is full of shit, but the key word is GUY
                      Obviously he didn't say he has money, but i know what he studied. it's just an observation.
                      (No weird stuff was present, like bragging or whatever. )
                      Anyway it doesn't matter, it's what I thought. That's what matters at deciding what the checklist can be right?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Hmm...well, let's see....

                        1. Obviously I look good enough for him to want to see me in the first place...
                        2. Yep, I have a pussy...lucky me
                        3. He appears to think I am good in bed- not sure what this entails though, as a woman- there's only so much you can do
                        4. I'm not clingy or psycho- no drama yet, he hasn't given me any reason to give him drama
                        5. Well- he clearly knows my financial situation is not equal to his (he's a millionaire, I'm far from it...), we're both divorced, he has a kid, I have 5 kids...he's never expressed any problem with that, but who knows? I know nothing about his family yet, but I know he went to a ritzy private school here in town so they must be well off, and I know he has a grandpa that he says makes moonshine in the bathtub and shoots at squirrels and scares the neighbors, haha. So clearly they aren't all high and mighty....
                        6. I wear a normal amount of makeup.
                        7. I've worn sundresses on most of our dates, but it's starting to get cold so time to dig out the leggings and skirts.
                        8. I took pole dancing for a year, so I know a little bit about that, but I'm not sure I could ever compare to a professional stripper and I've no doubt he's seen those before. So, what would be the point of trying?
                        9. ??
                        10. Hmm...well, how do I make him feel like my hero? He already knows I think he's amazing in bed! Lol

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          what makes him different to you than the other guys you know? What do you think of him?
                          if he can be your hero, it shouldn't be an issue to make him feel like your hero from time to time..

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Kit View Post
                            what makes him different to you than the other guys you know? What do you think of him?
                            if he can be your hero, it shouldn't be an issue to make him feel like your hero from time to time..
                            Well, so far what makes him different-

                            He is incredible, beyond amazing in bed!! (Lol)
                            He's been very patient with me, not pressuring me at all (no signs of neediness or irritation when I've had to let him know I'd be a couple hours later than expected)
                            No signs of jealousy
                            He's obviously very intelligent and interesting to talk to
                            Very ambitious (he only sleeps 4 hrs a night- which to me is crazy but I guess he gets a lot done)
                            He seems kind of ruthless at work, from the way he describes things but with me he's been a perfect gentleman and always says nice, flattering things about me
                            He's not really flashy with his money, unlike some rich guys I know- but I know he has it. He never acts like he's in any way better than me for having more, and THAT makes him stand out.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              so you would fall for any guy with money who acts normal?

                              Comment

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