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How do you test a guy

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  • Men Allowed How do you test a guy

    With test i mean.. how do you get a guy to show more of himself and his personality.. and not some routines, made up crap, fake niceness etc.

  • #2
    1) Pick a project.
    2) Ask him to help you with it.
    Remove the focus from "us" and refocus on "it", the project. Ideally you'll have picked a project that engages his intellect
    (problem solving), his passion (emotional substance), and his skill (will power).
    3) Judge for yourself.
    Note: even though the focus is on the project, he will most likely try to impress you still. Adjust for that.


    • #3


      • #4
        Yep, time, exposure, familiarity. Also don't worry about "getting people" to do things, either they do it or they don't, instead focus on giving what you want. If you want genuineness, then be genuine. If you want niceness, then be nice, then screen those who don't reciprocate.


        • #5
          Originally posted by Kit View Post
          With test i mean.. how do you get a guy to show more of himself and his personality.. and not some routines, made up crap, fake niceness etc.

          Call him out on it... Post samples, just be careful sometimes it may be genuine, encourage people to open up and be blunt, is a very good skillset to have:


          • #6
            To get to know me means
            asking about things
            showing interest
            acknowledging that you can tell I know more about it
            ask me about the most important parts
            spending actual time thinking on it (not just nodding along)
            trying to see from my point of view how it might relate to the world as a whole or towards other things
            just chatting and not taking everything I say as a 100% summary of all my views, but instead feeling it out over time to get the real view

            It takes me a while to trust a woman, and to open up, so she needs to be supportive, cuz things I know are also things I struggle with, so if we can't talk openly about it, then, it probably won't be spoken about at all

            For other guys?
            I dunno

            To "test" men, is usually done by observing how they react
            But I feel girls are usually quite off on this regard because they lack the patience and emotional stability to really handle anything that isn't immediately obvious.
            There are quick 5 second tests
            - is he clutchy/grabby (without tension)
            - is he false/methodical
            - is he indecent and prone to flipping into nastiness/pettiness
            - is he sex blind (thinks any sex is good, has no awareness of how sex will be)
            - is he too superior or dismissive of womens voice (ego complex)
            - is his view on women bitter or generous
            You would scan through things like that over and over to really get a grasp on it, or a feel for him.

            Then there are bigger tests
            - who is he in the context of men
            - where is he in his personal evolution
            - how much can he be trusted and relied upon
            - what are his flaws
            - what is the relationship in the context of your life, is it rare opportunity or just your insecurity or horniness

            Those must NEVER be answered in 30 seconds or whatever, they can take YEARS of effort to figure out and become good at recognising and seeing
            Women very often/almost always fail on the last ones, and are narrow and quick with the first ones

            I have spent YEARS peering into the void to understand some women.
            Fighting off my reactions, fears, my false conclusions.
            To do that requires, creative spark and intuition (to get past bland bullshit that stop you), and the ability to contain and resolve that fiery spirit, until a cool and level headed view is formed.

            Do not make the mistake of thinking it is easy... it is immensely hard and takes everything of yourself to get right.


            • #7
              Yeah I think the only meaningful short term tests are those who separate alhpas/betas and alphas/alpha1.0+betas.
              Basically seeing if the guy has a knee jerk needy or madonna whore complex reaction to the idea that you're constantly courted by other guys, and enjoy the attention. Which is probably reality regardless of how you present it.