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What does this guy want?

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  • #31
    So I noticed that he and the girlfriend became friends again on Facebook and wondered if maybe they were broke up and got back together or something. He definitely was being a little more distant but not completely. Normally he answers a text in like two seconds but last night I texted him because I'd had something fixed at the dealership and it was having issues again- dangerous enough that I managed to make it around the corner but they had to tow it for me in the morning.

    Anyway that is the only time he has ever not responded to a text and I was kind of bugged by it. I didn't say anything else and just went to the dealership with the tow truck guy this morning. He saw me sitting waiting and asked if I was ok and said I seemed upset. I said I was annoyed about having to come there again for my car.

    He acted annoyed with the service repair people and then throws out a comment about how when I texted he was watching a movie on the couch with his girlfriend (he called her by name because I know her). I didn't really comment just listened but he brought it up again a few min later.

    They were grilling at the dealership so he invited me to come get something to eat with him and was opening doors for me and asking about my family and stuff. That's when he commented the second time about his girlfriend and that her daughter had been over visiting and he cooked ribs.

    Im not sure if he was trying to drive the point in that he has a girlfriend or what but he wasn't as flirty. He still hugged me but that was about it and it was more of a side hug because I was sitting in a chair.

    i texted him when i left that i really didn't want to keep having to come back there for stuff (there are still some things he had previously offered to do for me and claims to want to do) and that I didn't want to impose on him. He said you are fine no worries and I said I felt weird about seeing him so much lately. He said "lol it's ok it's good times".

    I don't know. I'm having a hard time not being emotional about it and we aren't even having sex...And I have to go back to get my car still. I'm driving one from the dealership.
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    • #32
      I think he WAS broken up with his girlfriend for a while, and there was a window where you probably had a good shot with him.

      But you kept obsessing about whether he was broken up or not, rather than just finding out from him directly, or indirectly through friends, etc.

      This led to you playing it too cool, so he thought you weren't interested. Thus opening things up for a reconciliation with the GF.
      You go to war with the women you have, not the ones you wish to have.
      -Ronald Dumsfeld


      • #33
        Yeah, maybe so. I guess if they broke up once, there is a good chance they will break up again, but I'm not waiting around. He could have asked me out too and he didn't, so that says something.

        Im a little sad but I feel like he would make something happen if he was really interested. He's a guy- that's his job, not mine. Yeah I've played it kind of cool but I've also tried to drop some hints.

        The last couple times I have kind of pushed him away more but it's because he mentioned the girlfriend. Like, he was sick and still at work and said he felt clammy and I told him to back away from me because i don't want to get sick.

        It killed me though when he was talking about how he'd been sick the night before and so he got up and mowed the lawn because it made him feel better to do something and then he made ribs for the girlfriend and her daughter. I'm like wtf- hes totally tormenting me here. I would LOVE a guy that gets up and mows the lawn when he's sick and doesn't lay around. Laziness is probably my biggest pet peeve in a man. Getting my ex husband to even mow the lawn when he wasn't sick was a challenge.

        Anyway, I saw him yesterday as I was leaving the dealership with my car. He was doing something to a car outside and walked up to me as I was pulling out so I rolled down the window. He told me how good I looked (had just gotten my hair done) and that he wanted me to come in next week so he can set up having this little tear on one of the seats repaired.

        I kind of gave him a look like "seriously" because he's been saying that for a while and he was adamant that he would do it. Then I said there was a business related thing I had forgotten to talk to him about and he asked if we could talk in 20 min when he was finished with this car he was doing something with. I said I'm not coming back in 20 min and he said to call him. I kind of rolled my eyes and he was like can't you just call me in 20 min? I was like I don't know maybe, and he said just call him sometime today. I didn't...

        I just feel annoyed with him for the girlfriend situation too and I would feel dumb chasing after him or calling him so I didn't.
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        • #34
          So I thought he had pretty much indicated not being interested by mentioning the girlfriend, but today he called me. He said he wanted to talk about the business thing I mentioned. I started to say something about it and he said we could sit down and talk about it. I said I'm in the office training people today and tomorrow until 5:30 and he said we could meet after that.

          I don't know- he almost sounded nervous about it- like he was asking me on a date or something. Hmmm.... lol
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          • #35
            well i suppose it hasnt been a date


            • #36
              Haha- nope. He didn't call and I was like wtf?! I texted around 10 pm and said something about it and he said he had been waiting for my call and when I never called he assumed I was too busy to meet.. He said after the football game started he figured I wouldn't call. I don't know if it was really a misunderstanding or not. He called the next day and was like don't EVER think I would blow you off, I would NEVER do that to you. So I was just like ok and we talked a bit and he told me he was going to a funeral this weekend for a mutual friends uncle and said he'd call me on Tuesday to reschedule. Will see if he does...
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              • #37


                • #38
                  Nothing, lol- haven't heard a peep from him. A friend and I decided he's probably afraid his girlfriend will chop off his balls and feed them to him. Haha. I don't know.
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                  • #39
                    haha i suppose we know why he failed terribly in the past at being with you


                    • #40
                      In the last few weeks I havenít talked to him, other than him commenting on one of my Facebook statuses and he will still like things I post from time to time. Lame. The sad thing is I still like him enough that I could get past it if he made some kind of move or effort towards me, but if not then itís not gonna happen.
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                      • #41
                        So I ran into him the other day when I was working. We were at a ball game and I was training a new guy- a nice looking, flirty, 30 yr old black guy. Anyhow he saw me in the concourse and walks up and gives me a big hug. Then he notices the guy next to me and looks him over quick with this ďwho the hell is thisĒ type look. He pretty much ignored him and didnít say anything to him but kept talking to me.

                        He started talking and asking questions about the business thing I had mentioned before and I was like oh now you want to talk about this? He said he is working for a different dealership and I was like why are you hopping around from job to job. He said heís following the money.

                        Anyhow he asked about me and my kids and how we are doing and said he was going to call me on Thursday. He didnít though... Then a couple days later he posts one of those Facebook videos of he and I where it said we have been friends for 4 yrs on there and thanks me for being a great ďfriendĒ.

                        Im like wth? Lol but my best guess is he is trying to keep me around in the background in case anything goes wrong with the girlfriend but isnít trying to actually cheat. I donít know.
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                        • #42
                          i think i can agree with you, i would think the same @ that he probably just wants to keep you around for when its possible


                          • #43
                            So 3 weeks ago i called him (must have been shortly after I posted the last message) because a girl that works for me got in a car accident and was all stressed about not being able to afford a new car. She lives almost 2 hrs away but he said he would go pick her up and take her back to the dealership if she needed a ride. Iím like ok great and he comments that if I come with her he has a present for me, a car cleaning kit that he didnít give me before. I hadnít been planning on coming with her. Anyhow she is still waiting on insurance stuff so I told her but she hasnít done anything yet or called him. She also got another offer from the person who sold her her last car. So he calls me today and says she never called him and I explained the situation. Then he says when she gets a quote, get it in writing and he will give her a better deal on a new car. Iím like ok whatever he's probably just needing sales, right?

                            He asked about me and my kids and then asks about a sales job with my company (which he has asked about before). I think he would be great at it but he has a felony on his record from the past (selling drugs ages ago) so it would take some convincing for me to get someone to interview him. Iíve told him that before and didnít ask because I wasnít sure how serious he was and figured he would ask again if he really wanted to do it. Plus in a few months he is eligible to have it expunged off his record, it will just cost him some money.

                            I work in a different dept (marketing) so I donít think it would be a huge deal. I donít have a ton of interaction with the sales guys unless they have a question for me about something and I rarely go to sales meetings, though itís something I try to do once in awhile.

                            Still there is some what if about it. Hmmm... I didnít get the feeling his call was about hitting on me- I think he genuinely wants a new job and he knows our sales guys make good money.

                            Somewhere in that call he referred to me as one of his best friends and then was like well good friends. Just trying to sell me? Ha
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