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Why is he acting like this?

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  • Originally posted by Kit View Post
    He already said the ball is in your court when he said he wanted to talk. You want to put him in a more vulnerable position.
    Dont think you see it yet but yeah
    go talk; Don't think it will weaken your position. Be confident and strong.
    I feel like I was the one that put it out there and made myself vulnerable. I told him that I was blindsided by all the pics of them on vacation because he had told me he was going with his brother and that it made me feel really bad. He said he didnít mean to make me feel that way, then turns right around and posts another picture of them having dinner with another couple and calls her his ďloveĒ. Thatís why I told him to go fuck himself. It was cruel and unnecessary to do that right after Iíd let him know I was hurt.

    I was really busy the day he came and told me he loves me and wanted to talk and it was obvious. He tried to stop me once when I was walking down the hall and I said Iím in the middle of trying to sign an $18,000 contract and the printer isnít working. Then this girl came in for an interview that he had worked with at a dealership and he was trying to tell me I should hire her, but she wasnít actually there to interview with me. I stepped in and helped because the other manager was busy. I was kind of brushing him off but he also had to leave earlier than expected so we wouldnít have had time to talk. Heís had chances to say hey can we talk now but he hasnít come near me.
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    • Yet the ball is in your court if he tried to initiate. he initiated, you couldnt.. but your turn to offer an alternative if you are willing to hear him. It doesnt need to put you in a weaker position if you dont allow it to.


      • "So you wanted to talk to me?"


        • I still havenít talked to him. Itís been a few weeks. I saw him walking out of my bossíí office a couple days ago and he had his head down like he was upset and didnít see me. Then he went and asked one of my employees where I was but he didnít stick around and wait for me to come back. I saw he had a cancelled sale and I know my boss can be pretty nasty about that. He also hasnít been doing as well lately.

          I feel bad for him but I have to wonder if he was just looking for me because he was upset. That kind of pisses me off. Like, you only want me when things are going wrong but you go celebrate with other people when itís good? Thatís fucked up. Also, where is he when things are going bad for me? I donít see him there, so Iím not making any effort to talk to him at all.
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          • Iím gonna side with Kit on this one...again.

            Far better to talk to him directly, rather then endlessly ruminating and speculating on a seduction forum.
            You go to war with the women you have, not the ones you wish to have.
            -Ronald Dumsfeld


            • Originally posted by No More Mr Nice Guy View Post
              Iím gonna side with Kit on this one...again.

              Far better to talk to him directly, rather then endlessly ruminating and speculating on a seduction forum.
              I have no desire to talk to him at this point. Iím just giving an update. If heís not making more of an effort I donít even want to be his ę friend Ľ.
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              • I feel like you are contradicting yourself and your wishes..

                But do whatever you want, i mean, eventually that's what you will do anyway.


                • I donít know. I feel hurt and angry. I donít want to put myself out there again.

                  He came by today when I was with a trainee. He saw that I saw him walking by and he stopped and said ę hey, long time no talk Ľ. I probably looked a little angry. I did not smile or act friendly like I normally would. Then he asked if I was busy today and I hesitated a bit and then said sort of. He said maybe we could talk later and then left, but he did not try to talk to me again before he left for the day.

                  I donít know. Iím just upset and I feel like if he actually cared he would make more effort. Im not going to give him the chance to string me around.

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                  • Uhm by not going to him you might be saying that its okay if he strings you around?

                    idk thats what i read in this somehow

                    I really think you just need to have the chat.
                    If it's not to figure out what next,
                    at least it will help you move on with your feelings since you keep seeing him.

                    If you wouldn't see him all the time you could just move on by forgetting but that's not the current situation.


                    • The dudes just reacting to your reactions and you think "he should have an answer to soothe me, not just a reaction to an imperfect scenario"

                      Most dudes aint got no answers
                      They just got reactions

                      If his reaction is detatched or weird its cuz he lacks the thought process of "lets not make it weird"
                      Yes its lame but it is what it is
                      People are limited
                      It sucks
                      But shit all you can do about it other than control your own emotions and not get all in knots about shit you can't alter

                      Just be chill and get back to doing your thing
                      So long as no one is doing anything nasty it is all good

                      ^^^ the answer I'd give anybody


                      • Today he talked to me for a little bit. The first time I saw him I just walked past him without saying anything (he was taking to someone). The second time a conversation really couldnít be avoided. We were walking past each other alone in the hallway.

                        Anyway he stopped me and asked how I am doing. I said alright and he asks how the kids are. Iím just like they are ok.

                        Then he tells me he noticed I got a new picture and Iím like huh? He said my profile picture, talking about on Facebook. I thought that was weird because he never liked it or anything and why is he randomly bringing that up? Then he says he likes my nails, which they really need to be done again but I guess there is nothing else to compliment because our boss has implemented this new dress code where we have to wear ugly company issued polo shirts to work, lol.

                        Then he starts asking about my oldest son (long story) and some issues with him and says he prays for me and my kids every night. Heís told me that before. Then he says that every time he goes on an appointment he tells the customers about me and my kids and this car accident we were in. He says that itís even made people cry and that the last lady that he sold to was crying. Iím thinking why the heck are these people crying over my accident?! Wtf? Lol I just said well, do whatever you gotta do to make the sale, I guess. He kind of laughed about it but other than that I was more distant with him. He had to leave on an appt and I kind of walked off without saying a lot.

                        im just upset that he hasnít apologized or held a
                        real conversation with me. No idea why people are crying over whatever he is telling them either. Maybe itís because when I bought the car from him I kept saying I need a safe car because I drive so much and we picked one with a lot of safety features that probably saved mine and my kids lives. Afterwards I told him Im so glad you helped me pick out that car. Only thing is he is not selling cars anymore so Iím not sure how that ties in.

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                        • he gave you a perfect opening though

                          and yeah wtf at him using it, i dont like him XD


                          • LG: someone offered me a promo job (he is looking for people to do promo anyway.

                            I was wondering: what do you think are the best companies to do promo for?
                            I don't think I will do it, but if I might, I want to know first before just fooling around for 0 benefits.